Roots and Wings...

Gratitude - Day 10

2009-05-01T06:51:00.002-04:00

Today I am grateful that Hania is adjusting to the play room at the gym. Seriously. I thought I was going to lose my mind, continually dropping her off so she could cry pitifully for 45 minutes, while I did a half-hearted workout feeling extremely guilty. Do most parents cry on the treadmill? No? Um, okay.

Somehow, it clicked this week and she is good to go! No tears! Not even one! I'm grateful that my last excuse for not working out has been stripped away. The pool will be open soon and running after a toddler near water doesn't leave you much time or opportunity to obsess over cellulite or jiggly parts, thankfully. But just in case, I'll hit the gym!

I'm signing off for a week or so due to computer issues, but by the time I'm back online I will have:
had a visit from my parents
driven Keira to her new home, and met her lovely new family
successfully (I hope) driven 11 hrs with Hania by myself
given thanks to God for portable DVD players & Laurie Berkner cds
purged the house of all rummage for a big sale
reorganized all of our pics on the computer
spent more time at the library story time, Gymboree, and local parks than I care to add up

Wishing you a fabulous week filled with opportunities for gratitude!

Gratitude - Day 9

2009-04-29T23:42:00.002-04:00

Grateful for friends and neighbors that are willing to listen without judgment. I am always hesitant to reach out, but usually find that people are more understanding that you would imagine. I wish that everyone could have the experience of such wonderful neighbors, b0th past and present.

Gratitude - Day 8

2009-04-27T23:41:00.003-04:00

Hania - 2009

Missy - 1977

Today I am grateful that I can see a bit of myself in my daughter. She is a more perfect version of her parents, who are quite imperfect. I cannot wait to see how her personality develops. She is a strong-willed but quiet child, who prefers to sit back and observe a scenario before she rushes into anything. We often stay for 2 story times at the library because she uses the entire first one to settle into her surroundings. Once she is comfortable in her environment she is ON! Talkative, boisterous, verging on bossy, focused and not easily distracted when she sets her mind on something.
And do you see the crazy bruises on her legs? Yep. Just like Mama, all throughout childhood and even today!

Gratitude - Day 7

2009-04-27T00:01:00.002-04:00

Grateful that every day is a new chance to start over with a fresh perspective.
Grateful for the warm weather and a chance to spend time outdoors this weekend in the sun. A little color in your cheeks makes anything better.
Grateful for the simple pleasure of digging tons of stuff out of my closets and basement for a garage sale!

Gratitude - Day 7

2009-04-26T00:33:00.003-04:00

I am simply grateful to have made it through this day. It was challenging, to say the least. Hania was awesome and entertained herself quite easily with the U-haul ramp and dandelions in the yard. Grateful that I can be true to myself, even during times when I feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest. The sense of calm is still here. I wonder how long that will last...

Gratitude - Day 6

2009-04-24T02:21:00.002-04:00

I am grateful - no, ELATED!!!! - that we found a great home for Keira! In Texarkana! With someone who knows everything about Shepherds and has raised them her entire life! And she will still be able to be an indoor dog and sleep on their bed! These folks don't freak out over her high energy, they embrace it as a Shepherd trait, and they are willing to work with any of her behavioral issues! They do not have cats and Keira will be able to live the rest of her life without irritated eyes and itchy feet! Plus, they live very close to my parents and we will be able to check on her a visit her! A very difficult, but responsible, decision to make. Can you tell I'm thrilled? What, did the exclaimation points give it away? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gratitude - Day 5

2009-04-22T23:38:00.002-04:00

Just a gratuitous picture of the cutie-pie at the horse races - Keeneland on 4/5.
Today I am grateful for an open window. As in, God opens windows when he seems to be slamming a door. Yep, he is surely slamming that door and unfortunately it is swinging shut so quickly that both my hand AND a random cat got caught in the middle! Ouch.

My first meeting as a board member at Fern Creek Highview United Ministries was exactly the window that I did not realize that I needed.

I was asked to be the volunteer church representative because it was a good fit, given my work experience and interest in local social services. My initial reaction was "oh great, another activity that I'll have to juggle, arrange childcare for, why can't I learn to say no, etc." So off I go to the first meeting and I am NOT in the right frame of mind to work on fundraisers and answer personal questions from all of the other representatives, who are older than me by at least two decades and giving me disapproving looks because I accidentally sat in the chair where the director normally sits! Blasphemy!

Then the agency director walked in and I immediately realized that I knew him from somewhere. Then it hit me - this man was the individual that told me about our current church and the ministries back in summer 2005. I was attending a job fair to represent the foster care agency, in the hopes of recruiting foster parents. No one told me that it was a job fair for teens. So... I wandered around the room to familiarize myself with the local agencies and happened upon Fern Creek Highview Ministries. The director was extremely friendly and warm, and we began talking about our family's decision to find a church that would meet all of our needs - me being Presby-catholic and going to a Catholic college, and my husband being a lifelong Lutheran. He suggested St. Stephen's and I tabled that information for later.

Fast forward to January 2007, when we decided to drop in to St. Stephen's one Sunday morning. We had been ignoring the church, despite the fact that it was the obvious choice based on location and we drove past it at least 3 times per day. The welcoming spirit of the folks there simply drew us in. It is not a pretentious place, and does not have a large number in attendance each week, but everyone there is deeply committed to their faith and they were so very nice. Eventually I put it all together that THIS was the church that the agency director had spoken about, and two years later, here we were.

Fast forward to April 2009 when I feel like everything is falling apart around me, but I'm lead to volunteer exactly where I am supposed to be. The director was thrilled when he heard about the result of our conversation back in 2005, and remembered my story and face. This agency does precisely the type of work that lead me to pursue a career in social services, and it was energizing to see the many people that they assist on a daily basis in this economy.

As we prayed before beginning the meeting, I simply told God "I give it up". I'm giving up control. Giving up trying to change the minds that are not open. I will wait patiently and use this time to grow. Apparently the seeds are planted at the right time, but sometimes they take a while to germinate.

When I woke up this morning there was a very different feeling that came over me. Not the typical dread that I experience as I wake up and realize that this is serious, and damnit I just can't do anything about it, so I need to think harder, make a better plan, I WILL CHANGE IT, and on and on. It was unexplainable. It was peaceful. It blew my mind.

Today, I'm thankful for the ability to give up control to God.

Gratitude - Day 4

2009-04-21T08:40:00.003-04:00

Today I am grateful for the opportunity to experience holidays and daily activities through the eyes of my daughter. Everything is new to her, which causes you to pause and wonder exactly what she is thinking about. I wonder what she thinks when she sees our funky little handmade egg chandelier (which I plan to leave up for while, thankyouverymuch, because it is fun, and yes I realize Easter is over). Taking the time to slow down and WONDER has been good for the soul. Forcing myself to actually celebrate holidays instead of merely seeing them as "oh crud, this means I'll be receiving more emergency calls because the office is closed and obviously every child is going to have a mental health meltdown at 2am". Thanks, Hania! You are apparently a good influence on your Mama!

Gratitude - Day 3

2009-04-19T15:40:00.002-04:00

Today I am grateful for some small, effortless things that are scattered into our complicated lives. Like bulbs. Bulbs don't ask much of you. You don't have to ask much of them (unless you live in the deep South, and then you have to contend with the little shits in your fridge over the winter to trick them into thinking it is freezing, and sometimes you might confuse them with shallots and accidentally put one into your crock pot, but anyway...not that I would ever make that mistake.) Here in Louisville, they are easy. Johnny and I planted these several years ago and they have been a beautiful surprise every spring. Easy. Sometimes we all need a little easy.

Gratitude - Day 2

2009-04-17T21:34:00.002-04:00

I am grateful that I am going to come out of this situation with my integrity intact. If nothing else, integrity will give you peace of mind at the end of a painful journey. Integrity is what will allow me to look at my daughter and tell her that Mommy did the absolute best that she could, despite what her pride was telling her to do. I am grateful for friends and family members who have also conducted themselves with integrity, who can act as a compass on the rough seas.

Gratitude - Day 1

2009-04-17T03:53:00.003-04:00

Today, I am grateful for this little pig-tailed girl that has changed my life. I am grateful that she has shown me how to slow down a bit, forced me to lower my standards in areas that aren't so important, and raise my standards in the areas that are most important. So grateful.

Happy Valentine's Week!

2009-02-15T00:15:00.011-05:00

Yes, that's right. Happy Valentine's WEEK. As in, we have been doing Valentine's Day-related activities all week. Thank you, Hania, for the excuse to celebrate each and every holiday to the fullest extent! Just a quick recap of the activities:

Photo shoot for homemade Valentine's Day cards.
Hania was extremely agreeable to this form of torture.

Hand made Valentine's Day card for Daddy. We had to email pictures of the card to him, since he has run off to central Mexico for 3 weeks. Supposedly he is there for work, but my guess is that he is laying on a beach in Cancun.

One night we braved the new world of arts and crafts with a 16 month old, and it went shockingly well. Hania loved having paint all over her hands, and was happy to wait for me to give her one piece of paper after another to slap her little hand on!

Lovely flowers that Johnny sent to us.

Gift from Mommy & Daddy - her first crayons, markers that only write on a specific type of paper (genius, Crayola!), and two little books.

Oh wow, they actually work!

She picked these two balloons out at the grocery store. The square one is her favorite because it has a bee on it, and she knows that a bee says "buzz". I'm pretty clear on this, as she has told me what a bee says at least 36 times today.

Cutting out heart shapes from jello. Did you know that it is really difficult to eat jello with your hands? I had no idea. Fun, though.
No pictures of the heart shaped coconut cakes with cream cheese icing and heart sprinkles.... but trust me, they were a hit!

A cute video to wrap up our Valentine's Week extravaganza!
My parents sent Hania a package and she ripped through it in record time. She was especially happy to find a stuffed cat in her bag. The cats were especially happy that she can show her affection to this cat instead of to them!
(please excuse the weird narration, I'm on the phone w/ my folks during the video)

Big bang theory

2009-02-07T00:12:00.003-05:00

I have a new haircut. This was sort of what I was going for: Kenley from Project Runway Season 5. (Nevermind that she was horrible to my precious Tim Gunn, stay focused on the hair, friends.)

This what I got: My bangs may possibly resemble those of Lloyd from the movie Dumb and Dumber. But at least no one is walking around behind me poking my ears out. (way to be positive, right?)
The girl that cut my hair was very nice, and I think we can chalk this up to a communication error on my part. However, it has been decreed: no photos shall be taken of this mama until they have a little time to recover from the trauma.

Frighteningly enough, they are growing on me. No pun intended. The line between fashion forward and fashion victim is quite tenuous. Or perhaps I'm simply embracing the beautifully imperfect. Sounds good to me!

The baby's baby

2009-02-05T16:30:00.007-05:00

Hania has changed so much since the last pictures on the beach at Thanksgiving!
I have some catching up to do, but this video was too funny NOT to post immediately!

She will be 16 months next week, and is picking up words and phrases rapidly. Last weekend she gave me a hug (yes!!! The wild child is learning to be affectionate!) and said "baby baby baby". This is possibly the cutest thing EVER, and most likely she is trying to mimic me because I call her "my baby" when I hug her.

Apparently this now extends to her cat, Crusoe. He is her very tolerant baby. You can hear her say it when she lays her head on him, and at the end she says "bye cat". Do I detect a country accent? How did this happen? Is it a birthright that comes with being born in Kentucky?

We've started saving for his kitty therapy bills. "Cat" was her first word, and it was obvious she was referring to them, although it sounded more like "cock". Which is real cute, until she is screaming "cock" at the top of her lungs at a restaurant and people are snickering. Which encouraged her to yell with even more gusto! Yeah. Good times! How exactly do I put that in her baby book?

For Cousin Courtney

2008-12-19T00:26:00.004-05:00

I'm stuck. There are so many things to blog about lately, but I just can't seem to get anything from my head to the keyboard in a coherent sentence. But sometimes you just have to say exactly what comes to mind, and hope that those that matter will look beyond the imperfection of words and phrases.

My husband's first cousin, Courtney Harbaugh, passed away on November 28th at the age of 24. This was an unexpected tragedy. To read about her accident, you can click here.

This photo of us was taken the night before our wedding in March 2004. Courtney looks just gorgeous, radiant, while I'm hamming it up being silly. I have so many other more recent photos of her, but most are from the side or back or in motion, which is true to form given all of her energy.

Courtney, there is so much more that I want to say to you. I'm sure that Johnny would have something far more eloquent to say, but unfortunately I am the more emotional half of this duo, and I'm writing the blog. But you loved that about us, right? The fact that we were so different and still trying to make our marriage work for us.

I can honestly say that I have never met anyone that was so intent on enjoying life, or had such a positive outlook. You wrung every single drop out of the 24 years that you were given on Earth. Court, did you ever have an acquaintance that didn't become a true friend? Seriously? What is this affect that you had on people? You took a lot of chances and made sure that you explored all of your options. How many of us can say the same? Did you have any clue how worried Johnny was when you went to live in the Virgin Islands last summer? Girl... (; I tried to convince him that you were a big girl and would be okay, but I was secretly relieved when we had our convo about how damn lucky we both were to not to end up like Natalie Holloway, given the somewhat irresponsible behavior we'd each had during our college years. It showed me that you knew life was fragile, to be cherished, and I didn't worry so much for you.

Somehow you managed to keep all of us young with your contagious enthusiasm. Just popping in to your grandparent's house to tell us about your most recent adventure, always keeping them in the loop of your exciting life, reassuring them by your presence that they were still needed by the baby of the family. I absolutely fell in love with you early on when you were explaining who Jack Johnson was... you said "you know, he's for MY generation what Dave Matthew's was to YOUR generation". I about fell off my chair! Since when is 7-8 years a generation apart? We laughed about that one for a long time.

On the other hand, you were also wise beyond your years. Always walking a line between family members that were having difficulty, attempting to build a bridge between those that you loved most, and continuing your efforts even when it seemed that they were in vain after so many years. I promise you that I will always try. You know what I mean. It isn't my fight (I'm an "out-law" after all, according to Uncle Bobby!) but I will always extend my heart to both sides because that is what you would want me to do.

Your trust in God was just phenomenal. You didn't banter around His name lightly, you held tightly in your beliefs and I wondered how someone so young had come to have such conviction. I want to have faith like that. Really. But as a Girl Raised in the South would say, HON, this whole taking you to Heaven prematurely thing just isn't helping the cause, okay? So I'm praying for understanding and peace. I'm not sure what the morale of this story would be... a lot of "whys" are stuck in my head, even though I realize that they are not particularly helpful. I'll keep working on that.

Do you know what makes my heart ache the most? The fact that you never had your own family like you'd hoped for. Make no mistake, you mothered everyone and everything - your family members, your dog Paisley, your ever-expanding group of friends, each of your little students. Everyone at Little School seemed to know what a gem they had in you as a teacher AND a friend. It is obvious that teaching was your gift. Watching you interact with a child so patiently was amazing to watch, and the joy in your expression was obvious. When we were texting the week of your accident, you said that you wanted to be there when Hania saw the ocean for the first time. You were there. Maybe not holding her hand, but obviously you told her to be fearless just like you, because she ran straight into that darn water as if she had done it a million times!

Thank you for being a part of our lives here on Earth, cousin Courtney. Johnny and I talked about the best way to honor your beautiful spirit; we decided that being more positive and taking advantage of every opportunity that we're given would be things that you would have done (and things we both need to work on). Personally, I have been looking at Hania and feel even more responsibility to be a patient and kind parent, just as you would have been.
We miss you and love you sweet girl. Talk to you later.

Vintage Halloween

2008-11-03T20:20:00.006-05:00

No time set aside for profound blog posts this week, just a 30 minute window of "me time" while Johnny gives Hania a bath and gets her in the jammies before I'm on mommy-duty again so he can study.
But I HAD to post the Halloween pics!

Many of you know that Halloween is my favorite holiday, primarily because of the wonderful childhood memories that I associate with Halloween festivities. Each year my granny and my mom would meticulously craft the Halloween costume of my dreams. They teamed up to combine their sewing and craft talents to provide me with amazing and creative costumes. This was before the days of Halloween stores that pop up each September to provide you with every possible costume option that you could dream up. Nope, they sewed. Like, with a needle and thread. With their hands. What a foreign concept to me! My favorites? The Statue of Liberty, Athena, a gypsy, a very rotund pumpkin, a butterfly...the list goes on and on.
And guess what? My mom saved them. EVERY SINGLE ONE!

This is Hania in my bunny costume that I wore at 20 months. Circa 1978. So she is a vintage bunny! She is just over a year here, but it fit pretty well.
Droopy little bunny tail, running down a driveway. I realize that I 'm partial, but she's pretty darn cute.

My family brought another bag of goodies with them during their last visit.
My old prom dresses and accessories, circa 1993-1995. But which one to wear? So many fashion mistakes and only one night to relive the glitz, the glamour, the pain and agony of size 7.5 sequin pumps and the feel of itchy beads against your back!
I had to make a little sash that said "Prom Queen" because kids were asking which Disney Princess I was supposed to be. I responded "Princess Gaudy, of course".
Just a few quick observations that this getup brought to my attention:

1. My boobs are shrinking. As in, not-even-the-gigantic-sewn-in-foam-bra-inserts-will-save-you-now shrinking. Wow.

2. Rhinestone earrings this large should come with their own safety disclaimer. The could potentially cause a concussion if they fell on a small child.

3. Spanx are a gift from heaven. And mine weren't even the real deal. I used the ghetto Spanx-knockoff from Target and they rock!!! Too bad you can't wear them with a bikini.

4. These dresses must be made with chastity in mind. Don't let the show of skin fool you. By the time you could get out of this contraption, you'd have time to rethink about bad decisions you were about to make! (:

All joking aside, it was a pretty cute package the first time around. You know, in 1994.
Almost all of the neighbors dressed up, so I was in good company. I can't wait until Hania is old enough to be embarrassed by her parents' Halloween antics!

This is why high school girls shouldn't have babies. Because I don't recommend trying to chase a baby in your prom dress. It may result in flashing of neighbors or a sprained ankle, and that is even BEFORE a glass of wine! I'm just sayin'...

Daddy wasn't about to wear his cool skeleton pirate mask, because it made Hania cry. Like this.

Time to put away the Halloween decor, the fabulous vintage costumes, and the candy. Time to pack up this little Halloween jumper, as it will not fit Hania next year.
Don't worry, sweet girl. There are many more fabulous Halloween memories ahead for you. You are a Byerly girl, and we know how to rock Halloween night each and every year!

Hey! Look at my jugs!

2008-10-27T22:20:00.006-04:00

Were you a little scared to continue reading after that title?
Its okay to admit it. Or to laugh.
Because if you know me in real life, it is pretty clear that you'd be lookin' reeeeeal hard for some jugs on this girl! Does anyone actually use that term anymore?
You can blame the husband. His first response after he saw the milk jugs on our front porch? "Babe, how do you think the other women in the neighborhood are going to feel about you showing off your jugs like that?" Gotta give it to him...the dude is funny.

Actually, I just had to post this Halloween craft idea that turned out really well. Something you should know about me: I am... shall we say... thrifty. Not to say that I won't break down and pay full price for things on occasion, but generally it takes me a while to come to terms with spending any amount of money.
So when I found inexpensive craft ideas on a family fun website, I was hooked. I began having visions of Hania and I doing our daily mother-daughter craft (after our scheduled 2 hour nap time, of course!), while snacking on organic apples from a local orchardand listening to music representative of a wide variety of cultures on NPR. Stop snickering. It could happen. Someday. Like after she learns how to hold a crayon.

Anyway... here are our adorable milk jug ghosts, made using everything that we already had in the house.

And a close up of the faces that I drew on. We were going for funny, not scary.

A big thanks to my neighbor, Jen, and my parents for saving their milk jugs!

Here are the instructions:
Wash out milk jugs. Remove labels and determine which side is going to be the front of the face.
On the back side, cut a 2 inch diameter hole on the lower half of the jug using an exacto knife.
Draw a face on the front using permanent marker.
Stuff Christmas lights into the back of each jug.
Plug them in and.... Viola! Halloween decor on the cheap!

I'm so happy with my jugs.

Hania's 1st Birthday weekend

2008-10-24T02:38:00.006-04:00

Just a warning: this post is a gazillion pictures, because the mommy in me simply will not allow me to edit them any further!

Hania turned ONE on October 11, 2008 and both sets of grandparents traveled to Louisville to celebrate.

First, we had the neighborhood party on Friday night. The OUTSIDE party, thankyouverymuch. The big hit of the party was the bubble machine that my parents brought. The kids enjoyed running around and playing after they got hyped up on sugar from the mega-size Costco cupcakes. Very informal... no games, no gift opening, no drama. Just a great excuse to hang out and try to thank everyone for their support during her first year in the 'hood!

All of the kids are gathered around our front door (hidden behind the balloons) because they were "hunting" for cats and the dog. Little boys weaponizing balloons and other various party favors.Oh wait, there was minor drama. I went to pick up the balloons that afternoon and wasn't thinking about fitting 17 balloons + a large car seat and baby into the spacious Plymouth Neon. Hania vetoed the idea of riding in the trunk.
Daddy had to make a quick trip to go back and pick them up.
What is it that he says all the time? A failure to plan is planning to fail.
Yep. I agree. But I sure gave the party store employees a laugh.

Hania is getting ready for her first taste of sugar!Smiling at her favorite friend, Miss Julie.

Apparently the chocolate is a big hit!On Saturday we had her family birthday party...

It isn't a real birthday celebration unless you wear a tutu AND sneakers...

She loved the ball pit from Mommy and Daddy...

And MORE cupcakes.
These were not homemade (I used box cake mix and icing) but we spent the afternoon decorating them.
Watch out Martha. Homegirl can decorate a mean cupcake.
This design idea came from the "Hello, Cupcake!" book, which I highly recommend

She thought that vanilla was just as good as chocolate...

Playing with Poohpa Byerly the next day...

Making silly faces with Poohma Byerly...

Hania got a rocking horse from the Byerly grands...
"because every Kentucky girl needs a horse." Holla!

On Sunday we went to the park to show the grands how we swing and slide.
The Schmonsees grands played with her there.

Birthdays are exhausting!
And now we're ready to celebrate Daddy's birthday and Halloween!

We have a walker!

2008-10-19T09:35:00.004-04:00

Hania's birthday pics are on the way, but here is a clip of our cutie in the meantime to time you over.
I don't believe we've posted any video of her walking yet, and she started taking off around her 11 month birthday. She was cautious initially, but now she can climb to the top of the stairs, chase down the dog to pat her (more like beat her!) and tries to ambush the kitties.

Please forgive the location. We are in a parking garage on the Univ of Louisville campus after a trip to the Speed Art Museum. There is an exhibit there that Johnny wanted to see for his birthday (34 TODAY! Hard to believe he was only 24 when I met him). It is a collection of American art on loan from Yale and includes paintings by John Trumbull, who specialized in documenting the Revolutionary War. Pretty cool.
I hoped that the exhibit would be empty because there was a college football game going on, so that if she wanted to talk or run a bit it would be okay. I'm thinking that art hung on walls is safe from a toddler's reach, right? Yes, it was empty, but I did NOT bargain for the historic pieces of furniture scattered throughout the exhibit. So when she took off running towards say, a large sideboard piece made in 1887, I figured out that she must be confined to stroller or arms. And the screaming began. We hightailed it to a more remote section of the display so Daddy could enjoy (read: drool over) the details of the prints.
All in all, a fun day. But she was ready to run by the time it was over!

What's Cookin'?

2008-10-05T23:47:00.002-04:00

See, I'm trying to at least follow through on my promise to let you know what we're eating each week!

I've decided that since this is such a busy week we are going to keep it simple. No difficult recipes, nothing new, just mix and match basics. Johnny often jokes that we never eat the same thing twice during a 6 month period.
Hania's birthday celebration (ie both sides of the fam coming in) is next weekend, and obviously I'm going to do some over the top cupcakes and an awesome meal for the family celebration because I'm an overachieving idiot like that. Plus, Johnny is in his MBA classes 2 nights each week, and lets not forget his study nights. Or the fact that 2 babies rolling around on the floor daily + 5 shedding pets = Missy vacuuming and mopping nightly. So...simple meals are where it's at this week.

Meats/main dish:
Chicken, black bean and cheese quesadillas w/ wheat tortillas
Maple mustard glazed salmon (I use a local syrup that we bought at the Sugarbush Festival, mixed with dijon mustard)
Spitfire shrimp (a g0-to recipe that you can make as spicy or mild as you'd like)
Chicken & mozzarella ravioli from Costco

Veggies:
Salad greens w/ red pepper slices
Carrots
Asparagus roasted w/ a little balsamic vinegar
Acorn squash baked w/ a little brown sugar

Starches:
Pillsbury whole wheat rolls that can be individually heated (to ensure that I don't wolf down 12 rolls in a setting - not that I'd do that, but I have a friend of a friend of a friend that has done that once or twice...)
Cheddar bread from our weekend jaunt to Huber Farm & Orchard
Sweet potatoes
Corn on the cob

Fruits:
Apples from our trip to Huber Farm & Orchard
Plums, bananas, kiwis, raspberries

Dairy:
Jalapeno cheese from our trip to Huber Farm & Orchard (with pita chips)
Cottage cheese
Low-fat yogurt

Seems healthy enough, but I think some dietary changes are coming our way. Johnny's migraines are coming more and more frequently, and I would like to start eliminating possible "trigger foods" to see if that helps.
Now if we can just stay away from any sweets this week... we'll have plenty of cupcakes next weekend!
Here's wishing everyone a healthy week!

Freak Flag Friday - What's the deal with chickens?

2008-10-03T23:46:00.006-04:00

So can we just PRETEND this was done on Friday? (insert Sarah Palin-esque wink here) You betcha'!
I'm baaaaack! Never really went anywhere, per se, but a LOT has happened during the second half of September. Let's recap quickly, shall we?

Left job to be a stay-at-home-mom 9/19.
Continued to finish up work (although pay ended) through 9/26.
Immediately began watching another child that is close to my daughter's age.
Immediately acknowledged that this was, in fact, NOT necessarily a good idea for the sake of my sanity.
Acknowledged that my daughter might possibly be the easiest baby ever.
Made list of 10,000 projects that can now be accomplished since I'm at home.
Recognized the futility of this list while watching another child.
Was thrilled to see the progress that Hania has made since I've been able to focus on teaching her new skills.
Lost 5 lbs AND my mind from chasing around after small children for two weeks.
Recognized that we need in-home training from the Humane Society if Keira-the-no-no-bad-dog and I are going to coexist peacefully in the same home.
Continue to work on learning how to be still. And patient. Neither is a virtue that I currently possess, but I'll keep you updated on the progress!
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Has it only been two weeks? Really???

I owe you a Freak Flag Friday funny, don't I? These are 2 quick little stories, both chicken-related, that still crack me up. I can't quite muster the energy for one of my doozies tonight!

My first job in Georgia was as a school-based emergency services counselor, who responded to crisis calls from the public schools. On occasion I was asked to go to a home and follow up to ensure the family was using the mental health resources available. Weird job, grant funded, not well organized and very slow paced, which drove me nuts. On this particular visit I can't even recall why I'd gone to the home, but the exit is what truly stands out in my mind. As I'm walking out of the small rural home a chicken streaks out the door past me. I can't say exactly where this chicken came from, but apparently he'd been inside the home the entire time. He ran up onto the hood of my car, which made for a pretty funny sight. Yes, funny funny stuff, up until the point that I try to enter my vehicle and it flies straight into my face! I managed to stay upright and threw my hands up in time to avoid being mauled by a bird, but apparently this was no ordinary bird. Oh, no. He continued to strut around on the hood of car, pooping no less, and gave me a look at that said "Oh yeah, lady? You wanna piece of this? Bring it, fool!" To which I replied "Oh it's already been BROUGHTEN!" (Did anyone else see that dumb cheerleader movie "Bring It On" to find that quote funny? Or am I the only one laughing?) Swatting at him with my planner didn't do a thing, aside from provide him with some agility training. Then he did speed drills from the trunk, over the body of the car to the hood, and back again. Each time I attempt to enter the car he flies at me, flapping his wings, screeching, and I can't help but scream like a girl. Little did I know that every time he screeched, he was calling his little friends. Chickens are literally coming out of nowhere. From under the car, around the corner of the house, across the gravel road... as if they were lurking around, like the bad guys in a movie, ready to gang up and take down this citified female human that invaded their property. Apparently he was a chicken mob boss. The Godfeather, if you will.
I then realize that maybe the family who lives there could help me, and I turn around to see them gathered on the porch watching the spectacle. As in, studying the scene, chin on hands, watching like it is reality tv. I yell back and ask if they have any suggestions, and the father informs me that yes, this has indeed been a problem in the past, and no, he only does it with strangers so they don't know what to do about it. Thanks, buddy.
Finally I noticed a window of opportunity when Mob Boss Chicken was on the hood, and I made a break for it - dove for the rear door and leaped into the back seat of the car before climbing into the front and peeling off.
My conclusion: I am chicken s$#t when it comes to aggressive fowl. And apparently that chicken needs anger management, for which I can provide some excellent referrals.

The second story also occurs in Georgia, when I'm working in foster care. My job required me to visit each of the foster homes each quarter to ensure that they met safety requirements and were following agency policies. You tend to grow close quickly to the families because in completing the home study required to foster there are many personal questions that they are required to disclose, including their beliefs on a number of hot topics, details of their background, and parenting philosophies. I loved visiting most of my families, but one couple in particular had been my favorites since I'd met them - a Jamaican couple in their late 50's who were raising their grandchildren, and were ready to open their home to foster children. Their home always seemed quite warm and inviting, and the mother consistently had a Jamaican dish bubbling on the stove and always asked if I'd like to stay for dinner. I usually had just a little taste, and although it was delightful I had other appointments waiting and never stayed to eat.
Well this time she called me in advance to ask me to stay and eat to celebrate her husband's birthday. She had made his absolute favorite meal, a Jamaican delicacy that they only made on special occasions and she was so proud to share it. I have to admit, I was psyched. I loooove Jamaican food... jerk...curry...plantains...you name it. What could it be? Seriously, my mouth was watering all day. I even picked up a little red velvet cake from Publix for the birthday celebration.
When I arrived the house smelled incredible, the kids were running around having fun, it was a nice scene and a much needed break after a horrid day. They were so happy I could attend and the mother called me over to the stove, pulled the lid off the pot with a flourish, and there I saw... (this is coming across like a Halloween after school special)... CURRIED CHICKEN FEET. Bwahaaahaaahaa! I'm not kidding. Actual little chicken feet (claws intact, mind you!) filling up the pot, simmering in a yellow curry broth. Oh. My. Goodness. I vaguely hear the mother exclaiming about what a delicacy it is, and how much her husband adores them, and how difficult it is to find them in that part of Atlanta, etc etc. But I'm busy thinking about how I plan to choke them down, and instead hear Charlie Brown's teacher's voice: Wah wah wah, wahwah wah wah.
At dinner the mother served up the pot, ya know, so each of us could have equal amounts of the hearty chicken foot goodness. Naturally. You know, they really didn't taste bad but the texture was just awful. It certainly conjured up images of Fear Factor while I was gnawing on the talons. Don't you know that I thought back to that dang chicken that held me hostage at my car? Not that it made them taste better, but it was mildly amusing to pass the time while I chewed vigorously. I just continued to chew-swallow-repeat, all the while eyeing the Publix red velvet cake on the counter!

Apparently chickens were the only ones flying the freak flag in this installment!

Um, that was interesting

2008-09-15T21:07:00.002-04:00

The winds from Hurricane Ike affected us all the way up in Kentucky. On Sunday we had strong wind gusts for about 3 hours. They weren't THAT strong - I was still able to play frisbee with K-dog and take Hania outside in the wagon, but apparently strong enough to knock out power for over half of the state's population. Not even a drop of rain.

Our power was only off from 1pm Sunday to 7pm Monday, which isn't too bad considering that the official statement was that it would take "between 2 and 14 days" for full power to be restored in the metro area.

So the worst we fared was a little maneuvering with candles, and some lost dairy products. Not too bad considering what situations so many others are dealing with. It is interesting how quickly your thoughts turn to "emergency mode", when you think that you might not have power for two weeks. Thankfully we didn't have to put any of the plans to use. In case you are wondering, we took a family vote and we chose NOT to eat Keira. (:

This evening we had an impromptu neighborhood picnic after one of our dear neighbors (who is a chef at a large hotel) dropped by a ton of food to grill. It was a thoughtful little food drop, after only 24 hours without electricity! Everyone pitched in any food that was going to go bad overnight and we had a feast.

Tonight, I am thankful for good neighbors, a patient baby, prompt utility crews...and the impending use of my flat iron tomorrow morning. Amen.

What's Cookin'?

2008-09-14T01:55:00.002-04:00

I need structure. Would any of you have guessed that? I don't loooove structure, but it is truly necessary for me to function. I would prefer to fly by the seat of my pants more often, but the responsibilities that I currently juggle simply don't allow for it.

This need for structure also includes my blogging. Sure, there are some days that I just post pics of Hania, or talk about what we've been up to, and you can count on Freak Flag Fridays (which at one sick story per week, I can keep that segment up for at LEAST 3 years...), but generally I would like to count on a few set topics that might interest a number of the folks that visit.

So Sunday will officially be the day I post about the menu that I have planned for the week. I enjoy cooking, love trying new recipes, and try to balance healthy foods with a few splurges . Hopefully this may give someone another idea for dinner one night, with the added bonus of being able to answer my mother's eternal question that she always asked every day after school: "Who did you sit with? What did you eat? What did you learn?"

If the recipe is online I will link to it, or if it is particularly good I will write it out.
A little caveat: I try to make healthier choices when possible (light butter, low-fat cheese, low sodium versions of products, some organics, and attempt to use fewer processed foods).

What's Cookin' This Week?

Lemon, Rosemary, & Balsamic Grilled Chicken Thighs
Corn on the cob
Green salad

Chili-Roasted Cod
Carrot Coins with Maple-Balsamic Butter (go light on the butter)
Garlic cheese grits

Shrimp and Wild Rice Casserole
Green salad

Blackened Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo (yep, a splurge)
Oven roasted green beans w/ olive oil, salt & pepper

Grilled Tuna with Rain Forest Glaze
Sweet potato
Sugar snap peas

Freak Flag Friday - Mr. Naked Butt in Austin

2008-09-12T02:58:00.003-04:00

First of all, I absolutely cannot believe it is Friday already.
T minus 6 days of work and counting. Reality is setting in, and I'm not sure how I will feel about it until I wake up Monday the 22nd and don't have to go in.

Who is flying the Freak Flag in this week's story?

Mr. Naked Butt in Austin

We have to go all the way back to 2001 for this scenario. Looking back at how wild my life was at that point, I'm not sure why this story would surprise me. I was doing a full-time unpaid internship for my masters program at a large Austin, TX hospital. The internship accounted for at least 35 hrs of my week. I was also working at the SAME hospital as the night/oncall social worker for the ER. Also, to make some extra money on the side, I did bedside registration in the ER. (totally not social work related, but good money nonetheless)
Needless to say, I was pretty tired ALL. THE. TIME. The internship hours basically ran straight into the registration job's evening hours, and I'm pretty sure at some point I was doing the ER oncall gig with a psychotic lady and went ahead and registered her just because I knew how. Helpful, aren't I? I think the staff at the hospital thought I was homeless, because they offered to let me keep some toiletries and a change of clothes there so I could use one of the physicians' sleep rooms, which came in handy.

Exactly how does this pertain to Mr. Naked Butt? I'm getting there...

Every day I saw about 10-15 ER patients that were there in the hopes of obtaining prescription drugs. Most of these folks were addicted, so you would try to encourage them to get into a voluntary treatment program, but most of the time they left when they figured out that our seasoned ER docs would not budge.

On this particular day I've been called down to the ER during my internship hours to help out with the large number of psych cases and/or drug seekers. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed a man walking close to the med station. Very close. Wearing just a hospital gown. It is the same guy that I just arranged a slot at a methadone clinic for. He was a "regular" that came in weekly when his supply ran out, and consistently refused treatment, but this time he'd agreed to give it a try and I was pretty pleased with my little 22 year old self. And the last nurse just left out a bunch of vials and syringes in preparation for a patient. Ooh, this might not be good. I'm not a suspicious person, but something told me to keep an eye on this guy.

I turn my head for just a second and when I look back I'm greeted by his pink, scrawny butt. I do a double take (obviously!) and realize that upon closer inspection he has his hospital gown gathered up in the front in one hand. My mantra? "Please don't turn around, mister Naked Butt, please don't turn around!" It is all slow motion from this point on. He is raking large quantities of meds, vials, syringes off into his nightgown "basket" that he's made! And yes, he does turn around to look directly at me, with his little friend dangling in plain view. Um....security? I'm desparately looking around for someone, oh, I dunno...someone OLDER, someone BIG, someone who is NOT an INTERN!

He realizes that I see him and takes off running toward the front door. So I do the only (non) logical thing that I can think of and take out running after him, hollering for someone to get security, someone has stolen some meds.
And you know what I was thinking? Not about the meds, nope, but that I had just spent the last 2 hrs trying to find him a spot at the clinic, begging and pleading with the clinic staff that "Yes, this time Mr. Naked Butt is really coming!", and I really don't want to see him again next week to repeat this scenario like Groundhog Day. Dammit, he's GOING to the clinic! The plan for what I'd do when I caught Mr. Naked Butt wasn't quite so clear.

He gave chase for about 4 blocks, and a security officer was hot on my heels. Mr. Naked Butt wasn't even looking back, still holding his makeshift basket of goodies while his...ahem...goodies were flapping in the wind.
Did I mention that that hospital is right on a major US highway that goes through Austin? I-35. He was running down the exit ramp and ONTO the highway. I'm worried because a) he has on no shoes, b) he is going to get hit in his frantic state, and c) I'm going to puke my guts out from sprinting and don't want to do it on the side of I-35 with cars whizzing past. I bet you're wondering what I'm hollering at him? "Stop dude, it's okay! It's all gonna be okaaaaaay!"
They didn't cover this chapter in my social work classes.

The security officer caught him safely (if tackling someone on the entry ramp to a major highway could be called safe) and he didn't return to the ER that day. Walking back into the ER was the worst Walk of Shame EVER. Lots of jokes about "did you really expect him to give you back the meds?", lots of jokes about how I could get a 4th job in the hospital if I had all that energy, lots of jokes about the look on my face when I saw his goodies. Ah, the experiences that made me the cynical, cold hard slap of reality that I am today! (cue Streisand's The Way We Were)

So here's to you, Mr. Naked Butt, for showing us the true meaning of persistence. And for having the balls to show up to the same ER and look me in the eye with a smile later that month, asking sweetly for a spot at the clinic.

Almost Wordless Wednesday - Bernheim Forest with the Kelty

2008-09-09T23:36:00.003-04:00

You know I couldn't post something without ANY words, right?
By the way, did you notice the blog touch up? Thanks to those fabulous Blogalicious girls, Staci & Stephanie, who offered to give me a little bloggy nip/tuck. Can't have the blog looking saggy, can we? If anyone is looking for a new blog design, these are your girls!

We went to Bernheim Forest again last weekend and tried out the Kelty kiddie backpack for the first time. It was INCREDIBLE! It felt like she might completely tip out of it while getting it on, but once you have the straps in place she was very secure.
Only one of these red heads is natural...
I know, don't be intimidated, I AM a fashion icon. If you'd like a closer look at any of these pictures, just click to enlarge. You know, if you want to see my "Gettin' Lucky in Kentucky" shirt. Tim Gunn would not be pleased.
Hania loved riding along, nibbling on organic graham crackers. Yes, I'm one of those dorky mamas that doesn't let the child have sugar until the 1st birthday. She's rollin' with her homies.
It was BugFest at Bernheim, so there were exhibits, craft tables, touch tables, etc for all of the older kids. Hania was more interested in the drummers. They were singing African songs and she really got into it, beating on the drums, attempting to climb on the huge xylophone.
This is her looking up when she heard that they incorporated her name into one of the songs. "Who? Me?"
That wasn't very "wordless", was it?

Freak Flag Friday - intro & the Womb-Smiter

2008-09-05T00:26:00.007-04:00

I've been thinking about doing this series for a while now. Let me explain. I'm going to be leaving my social work job in exactly 15 days to be a stay-at-home-momma. This field of work has practically defined me for the better part of my adulthood. My social work positions over the past 9 years have provided me with stories galore. Stories you wouldn't believe. Stories you won't want to believe. Stories that I really don't want to forget. Oh, I assure you that there have been many touching and beautiful moments, but I'm only going to be writing about the over-the-top out-of-control (usually hilarious) moments each and every Friday. Every story has one common denominator: someone felt the need to fly their freak flag proudly!

I've already written about the burrito escapade, which you can read about here.

Who's flying the Freak Flag this week? The Womb-Smiter

While living in Atlanta I worked as a foster home recruiter and trainer for a therapeutic foster care agency. "Therapeutic" means that the children that we place in our foster homes were not your sweet little newborns. Typically they are older children who have experienced significant abuse and neglect, which means that they are likely to have learned negative behaviors as a means of survival. "Like back talking" you ask? Um, no. Like poo smearing. 24/7. Or inappropriately touching other children in the home, if ya' get my drift. Big stuff.

My job was to train the classes of prospective foster parents, and help them to decide if doing this type of foster care would be right for them. Obviously you want people who are mentally stable. Who know how to handle children. Who are patient and kind. Who at least have put their freak flag at half mast for the sake of appearances. The class is called a "mutual selection" process, meaning that they can select to leave at any time if they feel it isn't right for them, or I as the leader can select them to leave the class if I feel they are not appropriate candidates.

Enter Mrs. Peach (names changed to protect the freak-flag fliers). She seems like the perfectly groomed Southern grandmother in her late 50's, who wants to love a child out of their negative behaviors. Frosted pink lipstick - check. A different Vera Bradley bag to match each outfit - check. Big hair that I can't discern if it is a wig or real hair - check. Everything down to the comfortable chair is labeled as a blessing - check. She was adamant that she hoped to adopt and would settle for nothing less. There was always something about Mrs. Peach that made me slightly uncomfortable, as if she was always attempting to manipulate the flow of the class, or the way that she always waited until I was alone to talk with me as I cleaned up.

One afternoon she began talking about her grandchildren. Apparently they were in the foster care system and she was not allowed to get custody of them, so eventually they were adopted by an unrelated family. Strange. Then she disclosed that she wasn't allowed to see the children, but she had no idea why this was the case. Really? She also said that when she found children to adopt, she would force them to change their first names to the names of her grandchildren that she missed so much. Whoa! She wanted her foster children to be the same ages as her grandchildren and hopefully look similar. Creepy. This isn't Mickey D's lady, we don't pick them up at the 2nd window!

When she returned the next week I knew that we had some serious issues to discuss. I was leaning towards selecting her out due to her obviously unresolved issues about the grandchildren, but maybe a talk would help to clarify her situation? I waited until Mrs. Peach and I were the last ones in the building. I took the opportunity to discuss my concerns, starting out by saying that she obviously was still very hurt about the situation with the grandkids. SHE. WENT. BERSERK! Attention readers: The Freak Flag was officially flying high, no longer at half mast! She said that she always got what she wanted. Her case in point? The fact that she had stalked her grandchildren's' adoptive family, broke into their vacation home while they were staying there, and told the kids to start packing up they were going with grandma. She snuck out with the kids and faced abduction charges! Oh, and did I mention that she brought a gun to this abduction? Then she brought God into it. I was going to hell because He wanted her to "replace" her grandchildren and I was standing in the way of destiny. She was going to become a certified foster parent "no matter what it takes".

Now I've had many uncomfortable conversations in which I encouraged people to hold up on the classes. I've asked couples to continue working through their grief related to infertility before pursuing our difficult and emotionally draining level of foster care. I've had to tell people that their home is too dirty. I've even confronted a registered sex offender after I got his background check back. But nothing compared to this level of discomfort. I actually felt afraid and was mentally calculating if I could reach the exit if necessary, or use her big wig/hair against her as a weapon.

Finally I made a break for it, slid past her and started walking out the front door, hoping she would follow me on her rant. Worked like a charm. But not before she threw a few more insults at me. From the middle of the parking lot she yells at the top of her lungs: "I SMITE YOUR WOMB!" Wha? Huh? Whatever, just get the car and drive. Fast. Then on the way home I'm thinking about the "smiting". We Presby-Catholics just don't discuss the smiting all that often, really, so it is a new term to me. I was prepared for her to tell me I was a dumb b*@%# or something, but the smiting just clinched it for me that she was a certified lunatic.
We got a good laugh out of it at work and felt like we dodged a bullet. Can you imagine an already traumatized foster child living in that home?

Oh, don't think that I ever forgot about that comment. Every time I was ready to break out the good ol' First Response test little Miss Smitey Pants snuck back into my mind. But then I reassured myself that no, she didn't really have the power to do that. Three years later, little Hania was born. *Big sigh of relief*

Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be social workers!

Beautiful day in the neighborhood

2008-08-31T01:03:00.005-04:00

If you've read my blog anytime in the past year you have most likely heard me raving about our neighborhood. Well, actually, our neighbors. We're very happy to live on a street with lots of other families that also have young children, and we have become very close and depend on each other frequently, as many of us don't have family nearby. And not just the women...the guys are all pretty close too. (Well, you know, as "close" as guys will admit they are. They no likey the feelings so much.)

You can imagine our shock when we discovered that TWO of these families would be moving out of state within the same week. Both were for positive reasons, for better jobs and to be closer to family. But still... talk about a double whammy!

So what to do when the going gets tough? BLOCK PARTY, baby!
Here are the girls posing for one last shot together. Erin (furthest on the left, striking her America's Next Top Model pose) and Jenny ( in the black print top - you can't even tell homegirl is pregnant with twins, huh?) are the two hens flying the coop.
I can't even express how much I will miss both of these amazing women. Our relationship with their families has made our time in Kentucky a great experience. I love a quote that I read somewhere (maybe on a card? I can't remember): "Each person who enters our life, each spirit that accompanies us upon our journey, leaves us forever changed and enriched".

And then someone had the grand idea to get all the neighborhood kids together for a photo op. Yep, that's my tiny redhead screaming her lungs out. I typically don't post pics of other peoples' children for privacy purposes, but I couldn't help this one!
Being the culinary overachiever (or perhaps delusional lunatic) that I am, I decided to try some ideas from my new book: Hello, Cupcake! Full of the cutest ideas that are all designed to use easy decorating items like candy, and no special tools, only ziploc bags to decorate.

I was hoping to modify their design for the doggy cupcakes to make Arkansas razorbacks on the cupcakes, for our neighbors who were moving back to Arkansas. Why didn't someone warn me that making red icing simply is not humanly possible? No matter how much red gel dye you use. No matter how much you stir. Please note the color of the icing (salmon) as compared to the icing lid (true red). Ahem. So I went on to plan B: sunflowers, which are pretty and summery, and had a very detailed guide in the book.
Ta-da! Not too shabby!
They were a huge hit with the kids and I was fairly proud of the final product, especially considering how quickly they were thrown together. Guess what the lady bugs were made out of? M&M's. And they were crazy easy.

And lest you think that I am a classy, culinary wizard soon to rival Martha, I present to you my 2nd dessert. This is a cake made for Tvrtko (Erin's husband) in reference to a joke he told about himself. And it has to do with poop. I'm so sorry to admit that, but truly that just speaks to how close we are in this neighborhood.

Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?

I've got nothing, folks!

2008-08-30T02:06:00.003-04:00

I know what you're thinking.
We haven't heard from her in almost a month.
Her last story was about the dude with the mullet in Kroger.
It all adds up... she must have gotten caught up in all his mullety-goodness and run off with him, never to blog again.

Fun story, but the real deal isn't nearly as interesting!

I'm just in a rut. Several factors, none of which are truly awful, just some things I need to work through without influence from outside sources. I want my blog to be authentic, but I didn't want it to turn into a rant or a pity party, and certainly didn't want to worry people with my absence. Actually, life is a lot more manageable without me staying up until 2am to blog, but I do miss it terribly and plan to return very soon. Life has been traveling so quickly for the past several years that recently I just looked up, took a breath, and was unable to recognize very much about myself anymore. I think it just freaked me out, plain and simple. That and the fact that for the first time in forever, I don't have a clear picture...AT ALL...of what my life is going to be like in the future. Deep breaths, just keep taking deep breaths. I'm a planner. I just need a little more time to wrap my brain around things.

Don't delete me from your blog roll just yet, folks! I just have to figure out how to get my groove back, and quick. Actually I have a plan. I'll call it the GMGB plan, as in "Gettin' My Groove Back". To be shared soon... in the meantime, I leave you with a cute Pooh pic. Because a little Pooh can really make your day sometimes.

Maxi-mize your shopping experience

2008-08-06T02:04:00.005-04:00

Just a little story to make you laugh on a Friday. Let's set the scene:
Our weekend was so busy that I didn't get to the weekly grocery shopping, so we did it on Monday evening after work. Luckily, Hania is an excellent shopper and loves to ride along. She is obsessed with my paper shopping list, so I usually give her an extra piece of paper to play with and all is right with the world.

On this particular day, I had grabbed my favorite huge faux Coach bag that looks cute and summery. It is big enough to double as a diaper bag, and spills won't be a tragedy because it isn't the real deal. Here's an important detail that will play into the story later: I haven't used this purse since I was in the hospital for Hania's birth. I promise, it IS important.

As we stroll through the produce section I hear Hania cackling. Yes, this child cackles, she doesn't laugh. I turn around to find her bouncing and waving at a man that I shall henceforth refer to as "Mr. Mullet". Now Mr. Mullet is rockin' out in true 80's style while selecting his corn on the cob. He has spared no detail in recreating the look of that decade, down to the painted-on acid washed denim and concert t-shirt with the sleeves and collar ripped off. Hey, who am I to judge? Mr. Mullet sees me trying to reach a produce bag, and in gentlemanly fashion he pulls one down for me. Which is nice, but isn't there a rule out there about accepting favors from men with mullets? I think there is. I say thanks, Hania continues to wave at him, and we're on our way again.

Several aisles later, I hear Hania cackling again. Yep, you guessed it. Mr. Mullet is making cutesy baby faces at her, sticking out his tongue, bobbing his head. Hania has this effect on strangers, it seems. She thinks this is a riot. Mr. Mullet smiles winningly at me and winks saying "your little girl likes me". I smile back, but not too big. I'm not trying to encourage Mullet-love. And I'm hoping this isn't a pre-cursor to Hania's future taste in men.

In the dairy section Mr. Mullet appears yet again, and I try to pretend that I don't see Hania performing "so big" by raising her arms in the air. Oh no, he's trying to catch my eye. Hania, please stop engaging Mr. Mullet. See, you already have a da-da at home, and you never know if there is a MRS. Mullet around the corner waiting to kick the butt of any little mullet-magnet who is flirting with her man. Still my head is down, no eye contact, pretending I don't notice.

Then I hear the crinkling of paper. Hania is apparently playing with something in my purse. Still not looking...still not looking...don't encourage him... SPLAT! Something hits the floor. I look over to see that Hania has thrown the object from my purse into the middle of the aisle, and Mr. Mullet is dashing over to pick it up. Oh well, probably just some sticky notes or keys. I look over just in time to see what Mr. Mullet is handing back to me with a smile. It is one of those humongous post-partum maxi pads that the hospital gives you after you give birth! These are the ones that weigh 10 lbs and look like a diaper. Yeah, we're not bringing sexy back with that contraption. Apparently I left one of those bad boys in my purse, and forgot about it because I hadn't used the purse since my hospital stay. Thankfully, Mr. Mullet had no idea what he was handing to me, so I just graciously accepted it and then died laughing.

Hania thought it was a funny joke too. She had on a wicked little smile, similar to this one...

It was Jason

2008-08-05T11:04:00.003-04:00

I've had some requests from old friends to clarify who the recipient of the lovely 6th grade Color Me Badd tape was... (drumroll please)... Jason Henderson. Lucky guy. He had a much older girlfriend that was into PDA, so perhaps the song wasn't terribly shocking after all.
And now please, take a minute to bow your heads with me while I pray that Jason doesn't Google his name and see this story when I haven't seen him since high school graduation 13 years ago. Amen.

Procrastinator Alert! #50-100

2008-08-01T23:17:00.009-04:00

Um...remember a loooong time ago when I started to post my "100 things about me" to celebrate my 100th post? And only did 50 because it was way more challenging that I imagined? Not to mention the fact that it made me feel self-absorbed, which does not help the whole Mommy guilt factor...

Without further intro, here are #50-100: Things you never knew about me, and still aren't sure you want to know!
50. I have a small tattoo of a 4-leaf clover and the Notre Dame symbol on my hip.
51. 2 of my other girlfriends also have the exact same tattoo, courtesy of Spring Break 1999. Woohoo!
52. I wonder if theirs is faded and blurry, and looks like a prison tattoo like mine?
53. Working in the emergency room was by far the most entertaining position I've ever held. ER doctors were total pervs, but it sure made the nights pass quickly.
54. My tiny hometown in Missouri hosted the Miss Missouri pageant every year. I was always alternately envious and horrified at that competition.
55. Top 5 CD's I could listen to on repeat: Indigo Girls "Swamp Ophelia"
56. Buena Vista Social Club's self titled album
57. Natalie Merchant "Tigerlily"
58. Marc Cohn's self titled 1st album
59. Smashing Pumpkins "Pisces Iscariot"
60. My daughter's face peering over the rail of her crib every morning is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
61. I adore Project Runway but I'm no fashion icon in my Gap outlet t-shirt and shorts today.
62. I adore Tim Gunn and about hugged him through the tv when he said "Holla!" on the last episode. Can he really be that adorable in person?
63. I can be extremely compassionate and giving, but have a low tolerance for unnecessary drama and BS.
64. Having to depend on someone else for ANYTHING makes my skin crawl. I dislike it immensely. Which makes marriage a bit of a challenge.
65. Which links directly to my inability to delegate.
66. Which links directly to my job burnout. More on that after Sept 19th - aka "Day of Long-Awaited Freedom but also Poverty".
67. I believe that human sexuality is a continuum between straight and gay. Some folks are reeeeally straight, and some reeeeeally gay, and everything in-between. No hidden message there about me personally, just my belief.
68. We have a fairly small family; I'm an only and my husband is the oldest of 2.
69. Yes, I was spoiled as a child but at least I was appreciative most of the time.
70. I played the Frontline Fairy for all 5 of our animals last night, and only have 1 scratch to show for it.
71. I used to be a voracious reader, but since grad school I've only read a handful of books.
72. Some of this is a result of time constraints, but mainly it is because I become overly emotional when I truly get into a story.
73. For example - on vacation in Jamaica I read The Time Traveler's Wife and cried because it was so sad and beautiful - for 2 straight days. Blah!
74. Most recent ballsy thing I've done: pulled a tick out of my infant daughter's scalp.
75. During the next month I have SEVEN pot-lucks to participate in. If that doesn't say "suburbia" I don't know what does!
76. I always seem to gain weight quickly in the summer and lose it around Thanksgiving, every year. Isn't that backwards?
77. The smell of gasoline reminds me of Twix candy bars. Always has.
78. I've mowed grass exactly 7 times in my entire life.
79. I was almost arrested for public nudity on a spring break trip in Cancun...but I ran. Really fast. And hid from the cops.
80. And then studied super super hard the 2nd half of that semester and pulled out my best grades ever, because I felt so guilty about that incident.
81. I would DIE if my daughter ever did that!
82. Taking a hike or bike ride helps me to feel closer to God than participating in any church service ever has. But I still attend church hoping this will change.
83. Arrested Development is my all-time favorite sitcom and we still watch it on dvd after it was canceled. Why are all the smart shows canceled?
84. I really, really want to have a garden in our backyard and grow most of our own produce. Hope to start the process next Spring.
85. We simply do not talk politics on our house, for the sake of our relationship.
86. I wore hot pink shoes on my wedding day, and Hania had red shoes for her baptism.
87. I just purchased 10 new pairs of cheap undies and it MADE. MY. WEEK. It's the little things, folks, really. Cheap as in inexpensive, not cheap as in hooker-ish.
88. I love baking theme cakes with shapes, and can't wait to do one for Hania's birthday. My favorite was a pair of flip-flops for friends that were moving to Florida.
89. You almost have to sedate me to shape my fingernails with a file. Which is why I've only had 2 manicures in my entire life, and probably never again!
90. I have Aveda taste in hair products, living on a Pantene budget.
91. I feel passionate about youth participating in service projects. This was an integral part of my development, and I would like to create opportunities for them to have a similar experience.
92. Except the experience teaching summer school in Newark, New Jersey. I'll just tell them about that one! They shouldn't have to do it. It wasn't pretty.
93. One of my biggest fears is that my daughter will grow up somewhere that is not culturally diverse.
94. One time in 6th grade I went to a guy's birthday party and gave him the single " I Wanna Sex You Up" by Color Me Badd. I didn't wanna sex him up, I just thought it was funny. My mother obviously didn't catch that one. His family was Pentecostal. Obviously I wasn't invited back. I still cringe thinking about that - seriously!
95. I watched a lot of MTV as a kid, and now when I hear 80's songs I see the videos in my head. And then I describe them to my husband, who didn't watch MTV. My mom was pretty hip, and videos weren't as racy as they are today.
96. I distinctly remember my mom dancing to the video for "Peace Train", and thinking she was so very cool because she could move her hips that like (in our family room with red shag carpet - doesn't that just paint a visual?)
97. I love National Geographic, partly because it is an amazing publication, but mainly because it reminds me of my Dad, who has had a subscription since the 70's. I feel like I'm carrying on a family tradition of sorts.
98. My car has not been washed in over a year. Shameful.
99. But the baby gets a bath every night, I assure you!
100. So very happy to be done with this procrastination post! Grateful to anyone that has stuck with me for the last 50!

Not my kinda' delivery

2008-07-28T07:44:00.002-04:00

This is what the tabloids had to say about Matthew McConaughey helping his girlfriend to deliver their child:
Actor. Surfer. Delivery room DJ. "We found a great rhythm. Contractions started kicking in. I sat there with her, right between her legs," the actor drawls to OK! of coaching Camila Alves through the birth of their son, Levi, who arrived on July 7. "We got tribal on it, we danced to it! I was DJ-ing this Brazilian music ... We were jamming! She was sweating. No painkiller, let's go. She just clicked into that gear that only a woman has at a time like this."

Ok... no matter how hot this dude is... no matter how much I like salsa dancing... I don't think I'd be cool with him all up in my business playing DJ during labor.

But then again, this is also the guy that doesn't like deodorant.

Just more Mommy stuff...

2008-07-23T22:44:00.004-04:00

So...this week has been brutal. Between work drama, hubby in class 2 nights per week, and our best-childcare-provider-ever/friend leaving for Utah (yes, there is a sappy post coming on that topic later) it has been wild. Is it ever any other way?

Oh, what have we here?
Let's take a closer look... It's Hania's Mommy, who is passed out along with baby! A spoiled baby that doesn't want to go to sleep on her own. A tired Mommy who isn't listening to the advice everyone and their dog is giving her to LET THE CHILD CRY IN HER CRIB ONCE BATH-BOTTLE-BOOK-CUDDLE TIME IS OVER!
Finally we just let her cry a little in her crib last night and it was fine. Only 10 minutes of crying and all was quiet. And tonight only 5 minutes of crying. Who knew it would be so easy?
And guess where my parents are right now? Dominica. Diving. That's right, the old fogeys. Just acting like your typical grandparents...diving over the top of active volcanoes, taking 16 mile hikes around boiling lakes, swimming under waterfalls where they filmed Pirates of the Caribbean II. No knitting or AARP seminars for these folks. Geez. Kinda makes ME feel a bit boring!Mom and Dad, your "future diver" has been practicing in the pool this week. She launches herself off the side of the pool and into your arms without much hesitation. Looks like she'll be ready for diving sooner than you know!

For the rest of you that were hoping for something a little more than just another Mommy entry, don't give up hope yet! I have some good social work stories in the works, which are sure to entertain.

High maintenance

2008-07-19T23:06:00.002-04:00

I just can't figure out WHY our precious baby has been high maintenance since she's been back from visiting Poohma & Poohpa.

It wasn't like she was doted upon for a week.

It wasn't like her every need was met in a matter of seconds.

It wasn't like everyone spent 100% of their time attempting to entertain her.

I mean, are those freakin' spirit fingers, for goodness sake?!?
You know you're in deep when you're breaking out the spirit fingers!

Let's just file that one away under "dorky things you do as a mommy"
and not speak of it again, shall we?
Some of us have an image to maintain.

We have a crawler

2008-07-17T23:28:00.002-04:00

Guess who started crawling tonight?
And where was Mommy when this awesome spectacle occurred?
Um, on the potty.
Because that is a community event these days, one to be shared between mother and child.
Is it wrong that I'm going to edit that detail in her baby book?

She's been working on it for several weeks now, but this time she went about 2 feet in pursuit of the cat. He about jumped out of his kitty-skin. Run, little kitty, run fast!

Fabulous end to my day

2008-07-15T23:55:00.006-04:00

Can you believe it? I've been given my first award from Hot Tub Lizzy, who is one of my absolute favorite bloggers! She is one funny chick. As in, makes you want to pee in your pants funny. Insightful. Uplifting. Honest. A healthy love of all things Target. You need to go check her out.

I love that the SMILE award came my way. I need some motivation to SMILE my way through my last 2 months of work!

These are the rules:
1. The recipient must link back t0 the award's creator (http://www.thebabblingsofmere.blogspot.com/)
2. You must post these rules if you receive the award.
3. You must chose 5 people to receive the award after receiving it yourself
4. You must fit the characteristics of the recipient of the award, as posted by Mere.
5. You must post the characteristics of a recipient.
6. You must create a post sharing your win with others.
7. You must thank your giver.

Characteristics for the Smile Award:
1. Must display a cheerful attitude. (not necessarily at all times--we are all human)
2. Must love one another
3. Must make mistakes
4. Must learn from others
5. Must be a positive contributor to blog world
6. Must love life
7. Must love kids

And the award goes to...

1. Kimberly - She is wise far beyond her years and always has some amazing stories to tell about her travels. I can't wait to hear about her first year as a teacher in Salt Lake City this fall! Her students will be incredibly lucky!

2. Sabra - a dear friend from way-back, who makes her own plum jam...from trees in her front yard. And then she claims that she isn't a crunchy granola mommy. Um, I'm not buying it! Her 3 kiddos are always involved in fun activities and her positive outlook is contagious.

3. Amy - another dear friend from way-back. Our lives have mirrored one another since single-digit days, and here we are again with our little girls! It looks like this family is always on the move and never sits still. Oooh, and she's quite witty.

4. Where's My Angels - She has 3 girls that keep her on the go, plus a Child Husband to raise! How does she ever find time to sleep? Her stories will make you smile on a daily basis.

5. Buried With Children - I supposed you could say she loves children...she has triplets and their big brother! Her sunny outlook on everything from locker rooms to vomit-fest 2008 will have you rolling!

Thanks again Lizzy! You made ME smile all evening!

Who let the dogs out?

2008-07-14T00:47:00.002-04:00

I promise I'll finish the next 50 bits of useless info about myself soon, however I'm still a bit mortified that I told you about skinny dipping with carp. But in the spirit of non-censorship, I'm not allowing myself to go back and edit it out. I just threw that fact in there because someone last week said to me: "You know, I'm learning that my poor decisions frequently come back to bit me in the a#@." Which logically lead me to think about the carp biting ME in the a#@. All comes full circle, doesn't it? Makes perfect sense.

This was supposed to be a quickie about my friend Sabra's recent post (her name is a link). She is an absolute riot! She and her children have been playing dress-up with a random neighborhood dog. It started as a joke because this pack of dogs ran the neighborhood, so they put a t-shirt on him and laughed that obviously his owner would know that he was out and about if he returned wearing clothing! Much funnier when she tells it, so check it out for a laugh!

100th post celebration!

2008-07-11T12:39:00.003-04:00

Wow... it is hard to believe that I've had enough things to write about for 100 posts since November! I have to admit that I've loved every minute of it. This evolving blog has allowed me to share my daughter's progress with friends and family, and also helped me to keep my sanity by giving me a space to share all of the thoughts flying through my head. I've been able to connect with dear people that I haven't lived close to in years, and to make some new bloggy friends via the fabulous SITS site.

It is tradition for your 100th post to do a giveaway, but unfortunately the only thing I have to give is our destructo-dog. Any takers?
Or you can post 100 things about yourself that no one knows (or wanted to know, for that matter!)

I'll do the first 50 today, and the next 50 this weekend. If you see something that I should elaborate on, let me know and I'll (insert drumroll here)....blog about it!

1. I love the color green...any shade.
2. The last time I skinny-dipped I was swarmed by a school of very large carp in a murky lake.
3. Dancing is my favorite thing to do in the world, and I will do it ANYWHERE.
4. Sunless tanning lotion is my close friend. White flab = bad. Tan flab = not-as-bad.
5. I was back to pre-baby weight within 5 wks after delivery.
6. Don't hate me too much, b/c I still had buy new pants as everything had shifted and I'm still flabby.
7. I respect and appreciate my body and it's abilities 100% more after pregnancy, childbirth and maintaining the breastaurant.
8. I realize that the majority of people don't like music on blogs, but it is so much a part of my life and memories, that I'm compelled to keep it on here!
9. I don't talk about it much, but I believe in God although my religious beliefs don't fall 100% into any one denomination that I've found.
10. My social work jobs have defined me for many years, but I'm going to have to reconcile that when I become a stay-at-home mom this fall.
11. Jobs I've held: intern therapist at adolescent male residential substance abuse treatment center.
12. Maternity floor/NICU/ER medical social worker.
13. Intake and assessment for psychiatric facility. (oooh, good stories there, as you can imagine)
14. In-home child and adolescent therapist.
15. Manager at The Limited (a much-needed hiaitus from social work)
16. Foster parent recruiter and trainer.
17. Foster agency treatment director.
18. Mommy (most challenging one yet!)
19. Autumn is by far my favorite season. New school supplies, perfect weather, burning leaves, Halloween.
20. Favorite foods: Mom's beef stroganoff or chicken divan w/ curry.
21. Adore Indian cuisine, but don't make it at home because you can't do it well low-fat or low-sodium, so why even try?
22. Places I've lived: Mexico, MO; South Bend, IN; Texarkana, AR; Austin, TX; Buford, GA (Atlanta suburb); Louisville, KY.
23. Favorite place: Austin, TX all the way. Meets the requirements of a "Missy place to live": liberal, diverse, healthy, salsa dancing, breakfast burritos, mountain biking mecca. Case closed.
24. I used to play the flute, but I kinda' sucked. Played the oboe, and I reeeeealy sucked! Liked the piano.
25. I've been told I have an "ethnic" nose. Translation = big.
26. It comes from my dad's side, and I actually have grown to like it b/c my dad, uncles and a few cousins share it.
27. Except when I was in jr high and really skinny. I looked exactly like Blossom, except without the tv show.
28. My parents are still happily married, which is a miracle these days.
29. Our family vacations were always adventursome and focused on experiencing things as the locals did.
30. My parents are scuba fanatics, but the thought of being stuck underwater is so scary to me it takes my breath away. I'm grateful they take pictures!
31. I'm a total workaholic. Can't believe I don't have an ulcer.
32. And a coffee-holic.
33. My best work is only done under pressure.
34. My husband and I met in Texas while I was in grad school and he was an Army officer. Yes, I married the good guy.
35. I drive him crazy by paying in change at Starbucks.
36. I drive him crazy by being fiercely independent.
37. I couldn't care less what type of car I drive, or how it looks.
38. If I can't blow dry my hair I don't feel human and I'm crabby.
39. My hair turned wavy during pregnancy, to the point I can scrunch it to make "beach hair".
40. I don't really know what "beach hair" is, but it sounded good, no?
41. We have 4 cats and a german shepherd.
42. They are the cause of great stress and at least 90% of the curse words said in my home.
43. My go-to fall/winter outfit: fitted turtleneck, skirt, tights, knee-high boots. It's a proven winner. Even with the pet hair as an accessory.
44. I am not responsible enough for "real" jewelry, but my parents keep trying, God love 'em!
45. I had braces but didn't wear my retainers properly, so you can't tell. I can't believe my parents still speak to me after that one.
46. Best party we threw: holiday tapas party for friends/neighbors.
47. I have a very big heart and usually give people the benefit of the doubt.
48. When faced with a decision, I narrow down all the options to just the ones that are real-life possibilities. Some call that pessimistic, I call it realistic.
49. Favorite wine: anything from V. Sattui in Napa Valley. Fun place to visit, too.
50. I feel quite self-absorbed writing about me, me me!

Shame shame! (and many thanks!)

2008-07-06T12:50:00.002-04:00

Almost a week and no new posts? Shame shame! Tsk tsk! It shan't happen again, my loves...

Thank you to EVERYONE for making my SITS feature day such a fan-tab-u-lous experience!
Your funny and touching comments meant the world to me, and I hope you enjoyed your visit.
I promise to check the blogs of each and every SITSta who commented, just as soon as I return from vacation this week.

In some karmic twist of fate, our home computer crashed and burned on the the evening prior to the feature day, so I was like a wild woman trying to figure out how to get at the internet! Really, it was almost pitiful. No, I didn't go pimp myself out for wifi, I'm above that at this point. Give me two weeks without internet and we might have to lower the bar a bit. So I decided to go breakin' the law (can't you hear it? breakin' the law..breakin' the law...drrr drrr What song IS that, anyway?) and used the work computer to revel in my SITS love! Not really the "law" per se, but the HR-imposed "law".

The next day we hopped a flight to visit my folks in Texarkana, and as sweet as they are, I don't think they wanted our week together to be spent with me blogging, while they talked to me and I absentmindedly said "yeah" "um hmm" and "uh huh" as a response.
Of course this visit means a multitude to fun pictures are on the way. Our family hearts photos.
We've been having a great time, including excessive spoiling, eating and shopping.

See ya' Wednesday!

Welcome SITS Sistas!

2008-07-01T06:20:00.003-04:00

Welcome SITS sistas'!

So happy to be the featured blog today and thrilled to make your acquaintance!

Come on in, the door is open (ooh, don't mind the dog, she jumps but just might lick your face)

On second thought, maybe we'll just sit on the front porch because the house is always a mess, and we can watch the neighborhood kids run in the sprinkler while we have coffee and brownies. They're always a little underdone at our house, just so ya' know.

Then we'll tell funny stories about our week and laugh loud enough to wake the baby.

I won't tell anyone if you laugh and coffee shoots out your nose, I promise!

We have a little bit of everything here. Some bullriding, some stories about people who just can't stop apologizing (Parts 1-3, no less!), and of course you can't forget our 2 monkeys at work.

Usually when I'm with friends and family the conversation eventually comes around to something like this: "Missy, tell your social work story about...." (Fill in the blank with any number of stories that fit into the category of you-can't-make-this-stuff-up)

Now I don't make fun of the sad stuff, the clinical stuff, or the HIPPA-controlled stuff. But that still leaves plenty, let me assure you! So maybe my new SITS sistas' would like to hear one?

Okay, so it was my last semester of my masters program, and I was doing an unpaid internship required for graduation... As in, 40 hours per week unpaid. As in, thank goodness for generous parents so I can eat unpaid! But I snagged the coveted internship slot as a medical social worker on the maternity & NICU floors at a large hospital in Austin, TX and I was over the moon.

One of my duties included routine visits to any new mothers that were under age 18, to determine if there were any resources that we could provide for them to make their transition home a little easier, and to assess their mental state. It was just a superficial assessment to look for obvious issues, because as well all know, you don't really fall apart post-partum until you come home and have to be ALONE with the baby! So terrifying! But I digress...

So one particular girl that had just given birth was only 14 years old. Healthy baby, healthy mom. She had a large, loving and supportive family who were always by her side. I kept popping into her room to see if I could catch her without all 20 relatives and giggly 8th grade friends (yep, I said 8th grade, you heard me right). I was really happy one late afternoon when I stopped in and found her alone with her newborn. Immediately when I walked in I noticed that there was something unusual in the baby's bassinet. Upon closer inspection it appeared to be a half-unwrapped Taco Bell burrito. I'm thinking "Ooookay, not so ideal to have adult food 2 inches from a newborn, but just let it ride for a minute because someone probably just placed it there accidentally and forgot it."

You don't see where this is going, do you? I couldn't either.

We discuss her support system, how it feels to have this new responsibility (those darn social workers, always obsessed with feeeeelings!), and her first diaper changing experience. Then it just goes quickly downhill.
Me: So how is he eating? (totally NOT connecting the burrito into the question)
Young'un: Yeah, it's kinda weird. He won't eat at all.
Me: Well don't worry, it takes a while for babies to establish eating patterns and I'm sure the nurses have discussed your options for breastfeeding and formula, right? But we can get them back in here if you're worried.
Young'un: Maybe, but I mean, I just laid the food there and he just won't eat. I even walked away and left him and he STILL won't eat!
Me: Huh? (ultra-intelligent response, as I'm still not getting it) So you're laying the bottle down for him and he won't take it like that? The doctors recommend that you don't feed them laying down yet, so you could try holding him to give the bottle.
Young'un: No! (meaning DUH! Why is this old-lady 23 yr old so dumb?) I left the burrito there for him and then walked away. Because you know, with my hamsters, sometimes they don't always eat when you're watching them so you have to like, give them space and see if they want it then.

Oh no she DIDN'T!

Homegirl was going to feed a 1 day old baby a burrito.

Needless to say, appropriate services were put in place and I couldn't sleep for weeks worrying about this teenager and her baby. Seriously folks, you can't make this stuff up!

More stories from a disgruntled social worker coming soon...

Farewell for Grandpa Byerly

2008-06-28T01:13:00.005-04:00

For once, this post will be short and sweet. The pictures speak for themselves.

My Grandpa Byerly passed away on June 20th, 2008.

Although I am one of the only family members that is missing his memorial service in Minnesota today, I would like to share with them (and the blogosphere!) some of my memories related to Grandpa Byerly.

He was a war veteran, soul mate to Marge, father of 6, and grandfather of 11.

We really weren't as close as some children are to their grandparents, but this was mainly due to the fact that we lived 10 hours away. They were quite close to many of the other grandchildren that lived nearby. I developed a sort of fantasy world related to my paternal grandparents, based on the brief snippets of time that I spent with them. Looking back, some of these thoughts are hilarious! Maybe the rest of the family will get a kick out of hearing them too.

Grandpa's tattoos were fascinating, and I never really understood where they came from.
I always just assumed he was a rebel. Probably because he owned a motorcycle, and I didn't know anyone else that owned one. Ergo...he must have been in a biker gang. Duh. So obvious!

When we went up to visit them, he would take me outside and show me around their ultra-cool terraced back yard, or let me poke around in their basement filled with fish tanks and plants.

Grandpa and Grandma frequently sent me packages when I was very little, and I distinctly recall the following items:
a tape of the song Music Box Dancer that I would twirl around to for hours in our basement
maple sugar candy
"Lollies" - sweet tart-like pops that you can't find anywhere these days

It is clear to me where my daughter's red hair comes from. Grandpa's nickname was "Red".

He always wore bolo ties like this one.

Somewhere along the line Grandma told someone that we could just call them "Len & Marge".
Which made them instantly cool, because calling adults by first names was taboo.

I remember that he always smelled like cigarettes and chewing gum, and his whiskers ticked me when I gave him a kiss. When he'd let me go after a hug or kiss he would always say "ok then" and seem a little bit embarrassed at the affection. But I could always tell that he was pleased.

He had a series of chihuahuas that worshiped him shamelessly.

He loved his wife more than anything in the world and was very dependent upon her.
His world seemed to fall apart after Grandma died. It was heartbreaking for everyone to see.

Grandpa and Grandma often appeared to be free spirits to me.
They traveled to nearly every major park in the West, often taking their young children with them. Every winter they took their camper to the southwest (no, not an RV, a tiny little camper that they nicknamed the "Tartarus" after the ship on Dr. Who).
One year when I was around 6 yrs old, they stopped by to visit us in Missouri. When I went out to their camper they showed me all of these interesting items that they picked up during their travels:
a "shrunken" head (probably picked up at some silly tourist shop)
a tiny plastic toy slot machine (picked up in Nevada)
dried habanero chiles
large pieces of turquoise that they purchased in Mexico

How exotic were these people? Seriously, right then and there I decided that they were obviously witch doctors. Or outlaws on the run. Or that Grandpa was really Willy Nelson.
I'm sure I probably told some wild stories to my friends based on these assumptions!

Above all, I am grateful to my grandfather for raising such a wonderful man, who went on to become my Darling Dimpled Daddy, and my daughter's "Poohpa".
I know he is sad today, and I am sad for him.
So many of my father's interests can be directly traced back to activities that he did with his parents: his love of nature, biking, backpacking, gardening, and photography.

Much love to all of my family! I miss you all bunches today!

Homemade Baby Food Tutorial

2008-06-27T09:26:00.004-04:00

I have been promising this post for a while, right?
So WHY on EARTH, would anyone make their own baby food rather than using the neat little pre-packaged items from Gerber? Let me preface by saying that I'm not crunchy-granola Mommy. Although I want to learn how to make things from scratch, it just isn't in the cards right now. So brownie mix and protein bars are currently a staple in my cabinet.

Back to why:

1. I really like to know exactly what is in the food that we eat, and the idea of Hania eating baby food that was older than she was made me really nervous. Of course there are all kinds of vitamins in Gerber products, but have you tasted their meat combos lately? Bleeech! We have cut down significantly on the processed foods that we eat since I became pregnant, and I can tell a difference in the way that I feel. I'd like to start Hania out with that same premise.

2. It saves MONEY! All joking aside, if you know me in real life you are most likely aware that I am slightly CHEAP. Now I love giving gifts and my daily Starbucks fix will be difficult to give up, but I'm always appalled at how expensive our food bills are. When I started buying baby food every week, it finally occurred to me that the ingredients are the same things that our family already eats for daily meals. When you factor in the 10 for 10$ deals on frozen organic veggies, or super deals on items around holidays, it actually works! I'm participating in something called Frugal Tip Fridays, hosted by Sherri at Kaysville Momma. Go check it out every Friday for new frugal tips!

3. I am probably overcompensating for the fact that I closed the Breastaurant at month 5. I intended to breastfeed for much longer but stress basically but the kibosh on that plan! So yep, Mommy-guilt probably factors into this too. Doesn't it always?

4. Hania LOVES the combos we've come up with, and doesn't really like pre-made baby food that well any more. From what I've read, it is likely that if she is introduced to a wider variety of foods and spices early on, that she will be a less picky eater. Here's hoping!

5. Somewhere in the process it became FUN! And EASY! Just seeing my freezer stocked full of healthy, homemade baby food makes me want to do an interpretive dance of joy! See? I'm doing a piroutte into a grande jete, followed by tripping over a cat and falling down. That's how we roll around here.
If you look below, this is basically all you'll need:
ice cube trays
blender or food processer
annoyed looking cat (optional)
dirty dishes (optional)

No one accused me to being a photography genius, okay?

The directions are basically the same for every food:
Steam or boil any foods that are too hard to mash. Put it all in the blender and blend until you reach the desired consistency. Freeze in ice cube trays covered in wax paper, then pop out and store in freezer bags for up to two months.
Follow your pediatrician's directions on how soon to start certain foods, and always introduce new foods individually for 4 days to ensure that there is not a food allergy.

Of course Hania eats each of the individual fruits and veggies, but the combos are where it becomes much more fun. Here's a list of the various combos that we've done. We add yogurt or cereal to them to change the consistency. Hopefully it will give someone good ideas on how to spice up their baby food!

Mango peach blueberry
Mango pineapple banana
Blueberry pear (a favorite!)
Raspberry peach
Pumpkin applesauce
Pumpkin banana w/ cinnamon & nutmeg
Pumpkin peach
Avocado brown rice
Broccoli, brown rice & cheese (a favorite!)
Broccoli & chicken w/ curry
Green beans & white potatoes w/ oregano
Carrots w/ ginger
Carrots, beef & applesauce
Turkey, sweet potato & acorn squash
Turkey, apricot & brown rice
Chicken & prunes (a favorite!)
Sweet potatoes & lima beans (I know, gross combo...)
Spinach & chick peas w/ garlic
Cauliflower, chicken, chick peas w/ curry
Peas w/ mint
Red potatoes w/ rosemary
Zucchini w/ basil

Any other ideas for combos? I'd love to hear them!

Welcome to Roots & Wings!

2008-06-24T21:20:00.001-04:00

So...what do you think? I am officially Blogalicious! Thanks to Staci and Stephanie for making all of my blog designs dreams come true! If you are interested in a new design, I highly recommend their services. They were extremely professional, and although it is likely that I drove them crazy as a highly-demanding-princess-of-a-first-paying-client, they were so sweet and developed exactly what I was hoping for.

This post will be a little intro to my bloggy world, just in case you are new here!
I'm sure everyone is losing sleep asking themselves "Why Roots & Wings?" What happened to "And Hania Makes Three?" Or not.

I truly love the quote that is written in my header, and it seemed fitting for this blog.
Most of what I write about is related to funny stories from my past (ROOTS) or funny stories about my evolution as a new mother and my ongoing suburban drama (WINGS). Aaaaah, get it now? So I asked the Blogalicious genius duo to design something that incorporates my love of nature, with some whimsical elements. Yep, you heard me...I said "whimsical". Which is basically another way to say "flighty", "easily distracted by too many years of multi-tasking" or "wants to have a very large margarita but is so busy that it took she and her girlfriends 2.5 months of planning to actually have a girls night out". Who's bitter? Who's stressed? Not me. After September, NOT ME sucka'!

And about comments... I have spoken with several folks that I know IRL (that's IN REAL LIFE - uh oh, I don't think you're supposed to use text message slang if you're over 30) and they said that they don't leave comments because they don't have a blogger sign in. Here's the beautiful thing - you don't even have to! Just leave a comment and write your name at the end! Or if you choose to create a blogger sign in, it doesn't commit you to doing a blog (although I highly recommend it, as blogging is very therapeutic).

Did anyone notice that my "About Me" section has been blank for a week? That's because I really don't know where to begin. Not that I'm that interesting, it's just difficult to summarize yourself in a teensy little paragraph. Or maybe I'm secretly afraid that I'm just another mommy-blogger that won't stand out from anyone else. But putting all that aside, I plan to just use this space as an opportunity to do the following things:

1. Express the thoughts that race through my head on a daily basis. (To those of you who are clinically minded, NO, they are not "racing thoughts" per se. Unfortunately I don't think the meds are gonna' help this girl!)

2. Document the everyday beauty and drama of my life as a new mother, especially during my transition to stay at home mom. I hope that this blog will serve as documentation for Hania later on down the road that her momma was "keepin' it REAL!" Maybe during her first year of motherhood she will be able to break it out and see that it wasn't always sunshine and roses on a daily basis, and that is is a-okay to still be figuring things out as you go along.

3. Make you laugh your heinie off or at least hard enough for coffee to shoot out your nose. Yes, that made the top 3 goals. Although I am a definite introvert, I LOOOOVE to make people laugh. I believe that my life experience as a social worker, or growing up in a small town, or attending college at Catholic Disneyland as a non-Catholic, or marrying a Revolutionary War fanatic could possibly provide a few stories that you could get a kick out of.

And in the spirit of LETTING GO and just ENJOYING the experience of blogging....I'm going to do something really wild and crazy. Ready?
NOT edit. NOT spell check (although I am quite the spelling bee champ from back in the day). NOT worry if it was coherent. NOT be concerned if I offended anyone. NOT be anything other than a whimsical girl writing a blog....with a kick-butt new design!

Really, I'm not psycho

2008-06-18T06:38:00.003-04:00

Perhaps that might not have been the best post to write, and then drop off the face of the earth, huh? Several things:

1. I'm okay. Tired, yes. Need a margarita, yes. Psycho, not officially.

2. You're okay. (Just thought we'd have a little affirmation moment while we're all here together)

3. I'm seriously over-committed this week between a huge work audit, church meeting (ok ya'll, you can stop laughing...really, I mean it. Yes, the heathen not only goes to church but serves on a committee. I am fully aware of the hilarity of this situation, it's NOT lost on this girl!), attempting to clean/organize home before in-laws arrive, and spending time with the fam. What does this mean for you, you ask? No blogging until Friday at least.

4. I am leaving my job in September. Lest you think that I'm just someone that gripes and doesn't do anything about it, I felt like I needed to let you know. What does this mean for you?
More blogging genius, for sure!

5. If you want to see what we were up to over the weekend but I've been too tired to compose my thoughts on, check out Kimberly's blog about the bread-baking extravaganza. How cute is she? And brilliant. And talented. And we're going to miss her terribly when she moves to Salt Lake City, but thank goodness she's now blogging so we can keep up with one another!

6. There is a MAJOR blog makeover on the way! Thanks to the girls at Blogalicious (genius, I tell ya'!) it is looking better every day and it might be ready by the weekend!

6. I always keep a list (several, actually) on hand so that I don't forget everything that is going on in my head. This is what my "to blog about" list currently says:
home made baby food
church committee hilarity

red pepper, english cucumber, kalamata olives, cherry tomatoes (oops, mixed the lists, that one is for the Greek salad I was making!)
Why do they make tank tops for babies if they don't have shoulders?
the need to dance
recipe for Mom's apple pie with apricot brandy (can't hold that one back from the world!)

Please check back this weekend and you might see something more interesting that just my lists!

Who raised you people?

2008-06-13T22:28:00.003-04:00

Just a question that is on my mind this week. And it just happens to apply to the majority of the people that I work with and/or supervise.

Who raised you...
to believe that you could get paid to do nothing?
to think that is is okay to try to intimidate me just because I'm nice 90% of the time?
to understand that lying is an acceptable alternative to taking responsibility for your actions?
to be entitled to the point of taking advantage of a company "just because you can"?
to think that excellent performance = a reason to "reward" that individual with more work and no raise in sight for the next year?

We work on behalf of children in need. Sick children. Hurting children. Badly-behaved children who desperately need good examples of functional adults. Hope they aren't watching too closely, because if so, they might be in trouble. This is obviously a problem that spans generations, races, and geographic areas, because our agency represents them all.

It seems that I have some very big decisions to make. I understand that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, but hopefully he is also giving us the ability to use our heads to determine when the fight is no longer worth fighting, and if there are better places for us to utilize our energy and talents.

Oh yes, and who raised the lady at Kroger who side-swiped my grocery cart that contained a sleeping baby? This is not a Nascar event. You do not need to travel at high speeds down the pasta aisle. The alfredo sauce is not going to jump off the shelf and engage you in a game of chase...it will be there when you arrive at a reasonable speed. Don't think that I believed you for a minute when you said AS YOU HIT MY CART: "Oh sorry, hope I didn't bother the baby." If you see there is a baby, perhaps you should stop the cart. There are no breaks involved, just your feet. No option for failure, as you appeared to be able-bodied.

And as you careened towards me in yet another aisle, apparently your mother didn't raise a dummy, because you stopped just short of my cart as I said to you "If you're smart, you won't hit my cart again." Can you believe that came out of my mouth? And to a woman that was rockin' a she-mullet? That is not my style. But there is something about being a mother that makes you feel just a little bit 'bout it 'bout it.

Thank you for allowing that rant. I'll be back to my appropriate and cheerful blogging persona tomorrow!

So THIS is what you do at work

2008-06-11T06:05:00.005-04:00

I'm experiencing some serious bloggers-block. Perhaps because "life" is just getting in the way, but really, isn't life supposed to be lived in the moment? The fact that life has become blog-fodder is just secondary. I love being able to share my silly day to day events with you, though!

So I present, without further ado....Ebony & Ivory!

They've made other appearances together on the blog, and I'm afraid that they will become SO famous that they'll pack it up and leave their mamas to do a traveling tour for Oprah, Regis and Kelly, and Rachel Ray.
Maybe we should limit their exposure? (Nah, Hania's mommy likes Ann Taylor Loft and Arial's mommy likes Von Maur, so we'll see where their celebrity leads financially before we decide to cut off the mini-celebs!) Here they are: 8 months and 10 months. Two little monkeys that love to prevent us from accomplishing our work. Actually, as I've said before, we still get an amazing amount accomplished for having two babies in the office. Now if only others could use the same excuse...ahem...

(please note that Ivory - aka Thickalicious - is actually the younger of the two. The child can eat. There is a post coming on that this week.)

Hope that is a good dose of baby cuteness, and I will try to return to story-telling and sagas very soon.

In the meantime, you need to check out this post by Kat at Sunshine & Lemonade about "totstitutes" and the ongoing saga of trying to find appropriate clothing for her daughters. You will roll on the floor it is so funny!

Who wants a new blog design?

2008-06-10T11:03:00.003-04:00

Those wild and crazy SITS girls are running wild again, hosting another contest!!!

(can't you just picture them literally running wild, laptops in hand, giving items away

generously, like a couple of little mini-Oprah's? I can. And it makes me giggle.)

The WINNER will receive a custom blog header or a pre-made blog design

from Eightcrazy Designs!

Have you seen Shannon's designs? Well, let's just say they are to die for....

She is so creative! Each and every blog design that I've browsed through is unique, and gives the blogger a personalized place to write the next great American novel...or mommy drivel, like I do!

So this is why I need to win:

See, I have a conundrum. That's the word of the day.

See, I've already committed my undying love and future blog design to Blogalicious Designs.

They have gorgeous designs as well (and those Texas girls know how to do it up right!) but we'll do another post on them later... My blog needs a MAJOR overhaul, right? Since when does neon represent anything about me? Don't answer that.

BUT I have a lot of friends that would love to have a new blog design to kick off

their summer posts, and IF I won, I would run a contest to give away this fabulous prize!

I know it's a random contest, but please please please pick me!

And go check out Eightcrazy Designs today!

Pooh in the pool

2008-06-09T00:01:00.004-04:00

This might be the only case in which it is appropriate to have
"POOH" in your pool!

(to catch some of you up...our daughter's nickname is "Pooh")We took Hania-Pooh to our neighborhood pool today, and it is official:
She is going to be a Fishy-Pooh!

This was her first experience swimming!

She loved the water, and spent most of the time splashing and kicking.

She especially enjoyed laying on her tummy, and being pulled along.

Is it possible for hair to be ANY more red?

I crown thee, Princess Pooh.
Gentle Ruler of Kingdom Swim-Diaper.
Whoever invented those things is a genius...pure genius!

Here's wishing you a week without any Pooh in your pools!

Slacker Mom

2008-06-07T15:55:00.003-04:00

Excerpt from Friday morning...

Dog-daddy: Hey, we're out of Keira's ultra-hypo-allergenic dog food. I'll pick some more up
today.
Dog-mama: How much did she have?
Dog- daddy: About half of what she normally does.
Dog-mama: (looking in the fridge) Well, I can give her a couple hot dogs or something.
Dog-daddy: Are those cooked?
Dog-mama: Nope, raw. But you remember eating them raw as a kid, right? I thought they
were delicious raw.
Dog-daddy: No, actually I DON'T remember that. But it explains a lot, though...
Keira-dog: gobble, gobble, gobble...gulp...smack, smack, slurp...

Sometimes as a mother you have to take short cuts and be a bit of a slacker.

Incarcerating your child in a laundry basket is no crime.
It's just working smarter, not harder.

Someone needs to call the authorities on these slackers!
(notice the 2 little teeth on the bottom...)

And sometimes we rely on Keira to be a babysitter.
We pay her in dog food...and raw hot dogs.

Here's to all you slacker moms out there...
This job is a marathon, not a sprint, so we have to conserve some energy
for the big stuff and not sweat the small stuff!

A week of "firsts"

2008-06-06T00:30:00.004-04:00

We've had a big week around here. Lots of "firsts" for both Hania and her parents.

First time sitting in her "big girl" chair to read a story before bed time. Compare the photo at almost 8 months above, with the one at 5 days, below.

First time Hania's kitty, Crusoe, joined us for story time before bed.

First time that we noticed she is consistently sleeping on her side. And always with her caterpillar rattle and one of her bunny friends. She bunches them up in her arms before drifting off to sleep.

First time she went to the in-house day care center at the gym. We only had 30 minutes left by the time we were done doing the long and drawn-out drop off. Hania was just fine but her Daddy and I were the ones who were worried!

First time receiving a bump on her head (and the subsequent ice pack) that was Mommy's fault. Apparently dancing around and singing doesn't work when the baby has learned how to throw herself backwards. (She's fine, just a good solid 3 min of tears.)

First time going to Coldstone Creamery. Yes, this DOES count as a milestone! Especially when going with the entire Andersen family. That alone makes it an event/party!

First time eating Cheerios. She has progressed to doing the pincher grasp using her left hand, and always transfers the Cheerio to her left hand before placing it in her mouth.

First time eating meat. I made homemade baby food combos of chicken/broccoli/curry and turkey/acorn squash/sweet potato and she adores them.

Our little auburn haired girl is changing every day!

Step #9: Exhibit C - You can't make this stuff up

2008-06-05T00:59:00.007-04:00

***I'm not sure why the font size is all over the place! I've been trying to fix it for a while and can't figure it out. Hope it doesn't detract from my lovely story! I promise, tomorrow we're back to babies and daily rambles!

We're baaaack! No worries, I haven't been seething in some dark place about Exhibit B, life has just been a bit wild between work and baby. Typically this blog doesn't get that serious, so I must apologize if it took anyone by surprise! I promise, this one is going to make your jaw drop, but thankfully, it is my last Exhibit of Proof that I attract weird people who feel the need to make amends. I give you...

Exhibit C: "Mr. Hair" aka Love child of Art Garfunkel & Albert Einstein

This had to be by far the most unexpected amends-maker. A little background, please:

Sometimes I have a habit of making it my "mission" to be nice to people who seem uncomfortable around me. Typically it is someone who is very different than myself, or someone who has a pre-formed opinion of me that is inaccurate. Sometimes it is just that they are painfully shy with everyone. Usually I am just trying to figure out WHY they're acting uncomfortable around me, and I like a good challenge. If I know WHY you don't like me, it's cool. But I have this NEED to know why people act the way they do. Enter this dude.

We'll call him "Mr. Hair" for the sake of protecting the innocent. This poor guy looks like the illegitamate love child of Art Garfunkel & Albert Einstein. I'm not trying to be cruel, just painting the scene as accurately as possible. It is freshman year of college and I think I first met Mr. Hair when we had a course together. We didn't even talk in class, and he made a conscious effort to avoid eye contact. This is a major feat in a class of only 16 people, and whenever I see him in passing on campus he absolutely refuses to speak. It is painful to watch. He is possibly the most socially awkward human being I've ever encountered. As in, you can see the internal dialogue in his head as he approaches: "Should I talk to her? Yeah, I'm cool..no, no, no! Don't know what to say! Must avoid eye contact at. all. costs! (sweat, sweat, cough, cough) Must. not. look. at. female." These awkward moments usually ended one of two ways: 1) me mumbling "hey" and smiling as we passed and he ran by with his head down, or 2) him ducking off the path before we had to pass by one another. And wouldn't you know it...he is probably one of the people that I cross paths with the MOST out of an entire undergrad population of 8,000 people. Dang. So awkward that I find myself cringing with my shoulders up around my ears just remembering it!

I promise, all of this backstory has a purpose...

So, as I said, it was going to be my mission to be NICE to him. Because NICE GIRLS make the effort to understand why people are uncomfortable around them. Plus, I'm verging on painfully shy also, so I sorta' understand what he's going through. For the next 4 years we see each other in passing, I continue to say polite hellos and get little to no response in return. Don't get me wrong, I didn't spend a whole lot of time thinking about Mr. Hair. I was livin' it up, enjoying the college experience. I just basically chalk it up to him being very shy, and possibly having a crush on me. And we ALL KNOW what the priests tell teen males is the #1 sin: impure thoughts about your female classmates!
One time junior year I end up standing directly behind him at the student union and we're both buying Swedish fish, so it seems like I pretty much have to say something. So I say something about how man, I run into you everywhere Mr. Hair! What's your major? Mine's psych, blah blah blah. Ooh, another Swedish fish fiend like me, yeah they help me get through studying for that final, blah blah. Good luck with finals buddy! He paid for his Swedish fish, turned on his heel, and RAN.

I promise....all of this backstory has a purpose!

Then I determined that I was going to stop bugging this guy by trying to force him to say hello. Who cared? He probably just was very socially awkward and obviously he hung out with a group of equally social awkward guys and seemed to have a good life going here at Notre Dame, so why did I feel the need to force him out of his shell? Who was I to take him on as a "project"? He didn' t ask for that.

Fast forward to spring of senior year. My girlfriends and I are out at the Linebacker, which is the last bar that everyone is funneled to because it is the only one open until 4am. Dancing, drinking, and general mayhem ensue, which is fairly typical when hanging with my girls. We are definitely not the most popular group of girls or anything, but we have a lot of fun together and I think we all agree that college was a great experience overall. Back to the 'Backer... I'm dancing, gettin' my groove on, shakin' it, and then who do I spot across the bar, but Mr. Hair! And he's wasted. Uh oh. And he's walking straight over to me. Double uh-oh. This should be interesting. I've never seen him in a social situation before. Or intoxicated.
Mr. Hair proceeds to dance the night away along with his group of equally socially awkward group of guy friends, who are now beginning to resemble the Night at the Roxbury guys. And he's actually talking to my friends and I and having fun! Good for him! Then he's dancing right behind me and then I feel the standard "I'm-drunk-at-the-bar-so-I-can-put-my-hand-on-your
butt-from-behind-and-you-shouldn't-notice" move. (groan! cringe!) This move is patented, right ladies? So typical, and hey, we're at the 'Backer so you really can't be too upset. Your simple presence at this place practically screams "we won't want to discuss what happens here the next morning". But this development is absolutely SHOCKING given that Mr. Hair is compelled to run in the other direction if we're coming face to face on campus. Well, well, Mr. Hair, that shot of liquid confidence was all you needed, eh? I turned around and laughed and said something to him about "oh wow, maybe I should dance where I can see your hands!" and immediately he began a barrage of apologies, groveling and apparently instant sobriety. I told him it was no big deal, really, and he shouldn't be embarrassed, and hey, now that he'd pawed my heinie he at least had to say hello in passing! His groveling continued, my reassurance continued, until finally my friends were mercifully ready to pack it in so we could end this painful and embarrassing exchange.

I don't think that I really saw him again before graduation and then I didn't think about him at all for the next 8 years.

Then I get an email though our college alumni group...
it is Mr. Hair and this is the synopsis of his email:
(keeping in mind that this is the 3rd of this type of discussion that I've had in 1.5 yrs)

Hello. This is Mr. Hair. I hope you remember me. (Look up the name in the year book to verify. Oh yes, yes, actually I DO. Especially that awkard groveling at the Linebacker that night. I wish you'd "manned up" and claimed that butt-grab because that would have been less embarrassing that the groveling.) I am at a point in my recovery (WHAT? Recovery? From what? Nerds Anonymous?) that it is time for me to make amends to all of the people that I have hurt throughout my life. (Huh?) I am sorry for anything that I have done or said that has hurt you. It has weighed on my mind for many years, and I am so very sorry. (Is he talking about the butt-grab? Puh-leez! Because if so, there should be a line around the BLOCK of guys who need to make amends for that crime! Should I hire a traffic-cop to organize the crowd control in front of my house?) I hope to hear a response from you. I hear that you are a social worker and I'm glad that there are people like you in this world.

Huh.
So I email him back.

Dear Mr. Hair: I want you to know that I do not harbor any negative feelings toward you in any way. (in fact, I had completely forgotten that you existed) I'm not certain what you feel you need to make amends for. If anything, I feel badly that I obviously made you so uncomfortable when I tried to speak to you. I'm not sure why you were uncomfortable, but it was not my intention to cause you any discomfort. (of course I'm dying to ask what he's in recovery for, but chose not to pry...yeah, it's because I'm NICE.)

Why, oh why, did I have to write back?
Then the response came.

Hi Missy. I felt that my intentions toward you were always impure. (For Pete's sake! This Catholic guilt thing is out of control! You were an adolescent male. Hello?) When I couldn't look at you it was because I knew that I had the intention of having sex with you. (ewww!) I had been advised that for my first sexual experience it would be best to find someone that was very experienced, and I felt that you met the criteria. (WHAT? Presumptuous little a-hole! Apparently he was misinformed, as I was certainly NOT one of the more "experienced" girls there!) I devalued you as a person because of this, but then I started to feel bad about it because you were so nice to me. (There's that darn NICENESS again! Always getting me "devalued" and stuff!) Then I found out that you worked through the Center for Social Concerns organizing Urban Plunge and felt even worse about my intentions. (Oh, ok, so then you figured I might take you on as a CHARITY CASE or something, eh? I don't think that's what Catholic charities had in mind, buddy!) Please accept my most sincere apologies.
Mr. Hair.

Oh. My. Goodness.
What do you say to THAT?
My response was simple.

Dear Mr. Hair: I wish you well in your recovery. It is probably a good thing that I didn't understand your intentions at the time, or I would not have been NICE to you. Just to clarify, you were misinformed.

You can't make this stuff up, people!

So this is what I'm taking away from all of this:

If you are making amends to someone for something that they didn't KNOW ABOUT, is it really helpful to inform them? Or is it just more hurtful?

And did you truly mean to make amends, couldn't you just take it up with God?

So for anyone that tries to involve me in their Step #9:

Save it! I FORGIVE YOU already! I'm a pretty chilled out individual, and chances are I haven't spent every waking second thinking about it!
So save me the drama, say you're sorry to your higher power and
leave me out of it please!

Are you feelin' SAUCY?

2008-06-04T02:00:00.002-04:00

Well, those SAUCY ladies, Heather and Tiffany are at it again!

They have created a fabulous new website that you need to check out:

The Secret is in The Sauce

It was created as a way for bloggers to network, showcase their blog, and increase their readers.

And you know what more READERS mean, right? More COMMENTS from your sistas!
Admit it, you're looking for your comments, aren't you?
It is verging on obsession, isn't it? Busted!

Want some more incentive to get on over there?

The SAUCE sistas are running a contest, including a digital camera, voice recorder,
and blog makeover! Deadline is Friday, June 6th.

Directions on how to enter the contest and how to have your blog featured
are on the site! You will discover some really great sites that just might become your daily reads! And their blog design is pink and leopard...can you beat that with a stick?

GO NOW!!!!!

Step #9: Exhibit B - You've got to be kidding me!

2008-06-02T03:51:00.000-04:00

To catch you up, we're on #2 of a 3 part story. About folks from my past who all decided to come to me wanting to make amends. For being shit-heads, I suppose. Sorry, I'm trying to be NICE.
But I've had a chance to go to the happy place in my head and I'm all better now!

Exhibit B: Much-older male friend from Texas.
This one's the REAL DEAL, baby. Workin' that Step #9. As in, emailing me from rehab.
Oh yeah.
We met while I was doing my ER-oncall-social-worker-gig and he was a paramedic. I'm not dating anyone, he is divorced. I befriended him knowing that it is platonic, because hey, I don't kiss my daddy! I think he gets this as well. Lots of laughs at 2am at work, he cooks a mean lobster, has a beautiful nomadic spirit, sweet 12 year old daughter and a mother who is a hilarious, jaded social worker that I enjoy cutting up with. Hijinks ensue and fun follows this guy...we swim with carp at the lake, drink hard cider on his roof and talk about religion, and I watch his daughter occasionally. Over time, his free spirit eventually morphs into him becoming completely absent-minded, never having money and blowing off his job. Not ideal, but he's a friend, after all, and don't we help friends when they're in need? NICE people do. All is well until boyfriend (now-hubby) and I get back together, and I think the 3 of us can hang out. We're all just friends, right? Um, not so much. Both guys see something that I don't - it isn't platonic to much-older male friend from Texas. (Note to self: Dude! Doesn't the fact I've never even kissed you lend a clue? Really? All that time just the two of us? Nothing. In denial much?) I slowly try to disengage from the friendship, and his daughter is never around anymore because school started again and she lives with mom in another city. The last time I see him is Sept 11th when he shows up at my front door for some reassurance that the world is going to be all right, and I tell him that I can't continue to see him if it isn't platonic. Never see him again. Guess I got my answer, huh?

Fast forward 7 years. He contacts me to say he is on Step #9 and feels he must make amends for "using me" and "being dishonest". I really wasn't too upset about the whole situation and it never really weighed on me. Yes, I was annoyed when he was irresponsible, but it wasn't like I was dating him or something. And yes, I wish he'd been up front about any feelings he had for me so that I could nip that shiz-nit in the bud immediately. But if he feels that his amends provide closure and assist in his recovery, then I'm supportive and accept his apology for....whatever. My goal is to live life without regrets and to appreciate every experience that I'm given.
Then the kicker: someone else is in rehab also...the daughter, who is now 18 or 19. Poor kid must've had a rough adolescence, apparently, which makes me feel bad because I still picture her as a 12 year old. She doesn't want to make amends, per say, but she has a question for me. I can't believe that she even remembers me, and I can't imagine what she wants to ask me.
She wants to know WHY I NEVER MARRIED HER DADDY BECAUSE HE TOLD HER THAT SUMMER THAT I WAS PROBABLY GOING TO BE HER NEW MOMMY. Whaaaaaat????? Words can't describe how I felt. So bad for her, so pissed at her presumptuous dad, and then I'm thinking "No wonder the dude's in rehab, because he must've been high the entire time we were friends to have come to a conclusion like that"! So I tell her that it was never like that between her father and I, and he never told me he felt that way or I would not have hung out with him, blah blah blah... a million useless words and I'm left wondering how many years she thought about that question. Still hurts my heart to this day. I pray for her a lot.

Are you wondering about my response to Much-older male friend from Texas? It was not NICE.
And if I ever move back to Texas I will explain to dear hubby that I have to see him just one time. Just long enough to sock him in the nose.

Going to another happy place.. Exhibit C is the best yet!

Step #9: Exhibit A - How cute is that?

2008-06-02T01:55:00.000-04:00

Let me begin by saying that I am a NICE GIRL. Doesn't always make for crazy party stories, but it's true. I was raised as an only child from a NICE family, in a NICE small town, went to a NICE respectable college, had NICE jobs and even married the NICE guy. NICE NICE NICE.
I don't generally run with packs of people that are "working the steps". This is not because I am hoity-toity (is that a word, really?) but mainly due to the fact that we're all aware of my strong addictive tendencies with caffeine, Publix red velvet cake with cream cheese icing and collecting stray cats, so let's just not tempt fate, okay? My NICENESS just might spiral out of control!

That said, I have had multiple individuals over the past several years that decided it was time to contact me to complete their Step #9.

According to the handbook, Step #9 is when the individual in recovery is required to make direct amends to all persons that they have harmed, either intentionally or unintentionally.
Doesn't that just sound cleansing? Ahhhh...like a kitchen hand soap labeled "Step #9 - cucumber, freshly mowed grass, and newborn baby". Clean. Simple. Purifying.

But why, oh why, did they have to come crawling out of the woodwork all at one time?

I present to you, Exhibit A: Boy that I dated briefly from senior year of college.
(In his defense, he was not doing the 12 step program, but simply felt that he needed to make amends. Close enough.) We definitely weren't each other's "type", he gave me a South Park video collection for Christmas, he was very Catholic and spoke extensively about how he expected his future spouse to practice natural family planning, and I was almost compelled to kick him from his own moving vehicle on a trip to the Gator Bowl due to his incessant love of a good heated debate. Then he suddenly broke it off, during your typical "we have things to talk about" meeting at a coffee house. No biggie, really. We both knew it wasn't going anywhere, my pride was wounded a bit, but it was okay and I didn't think about it for more than a month. I just told myself that after he witnessed me dressed as a sexy biker for Halloween he just couldn't handle the constant need to run to confession. Giggle, giggle, giggle...
So he emails to say he feels badly about how things ended, and that he is very happy now with his sweet and talented wife, and he credits our brief relationship for showing him that he needs to be more patient with people, and this revelation helped him to solidify his relationship with her. Ok, I'm thinking, that's kinda NICE. Warm fuzzies all the way around. Glad to help you out, buddy.
Moral of the story: Hope you didn't give her South Park videos for Christmas, dude.

We may have to do this one in installments, girls!

Exhibit B is a bit frustrating, so you'll have to give me time to go to my happy place before I tell it!

You know you're in trouble when....

2008-05-29T00:48:00.000-04:00

...you get the biggest coffee they serve today so you can have "leftovers" the next morning when you know you won't have time to feed the addiction with a trip to Starbucks at 7am. Who in their right mind drinks "coffee leftovers?" Only a true caffeine-dependent. Perhaps I should start working the 12 steps. The first step is admitting you are powerless over your addiction. No coercion or intervention is necessary folks, I'll stand up and give my testimonial shamelessly! I believe that I can blame it all on my career choice of social work. Every addict has to have a scapegoat, no?

(***Disclaimer: this post is all in fun! Please don't take this as my criticism of addiction or try to stage an intervention for me at the Starbucks drive-thru. A) I understand that addiction is a serious issue that is not to be mocked, and B) I very well might run you down to place my order at the drive-thru. Consider yourself warned.)

It all began innocently enough in 1999, senior year of college...a paper cup of cheap vanilla latte from the vending machines in the college library. A girl has to have energy to cram for her Spanish final, right? Or maybe because it was fun to take a break and gawk at all the faux-Goth kids that were studying in the basement where the coffee machine was... Yeah, right...as if there would be legit Goth kids attending school at Catholic Disneyland! Whatever...

Fast forward to 2001 when I'm about to graduate from the masters program. The entire time I lived in Austin I might have made one pot of coffee. But I was starting to become a "social drinker" by going to Mozart's coffee shop...again, to "study" and check out the scene on the lake front while sipping a sugar-laden mocha. In an ultra-caffeinated state I churn out a 100 page paper on social work policy as it relates to the unauthorized sterilization of the MHMR population - in ONE NIGHT - and receive a BIG FAT "A". Talk about reinforcement! Those darn enablers! Plus, my unpaid 35-hr per week internship was at an in-patient substance abuse program for adolescent males who were court ordered to attend. And I am still fairly shy. And speak quietly. And look 16. Do you see where this is going? BIG FUN! Do you know much about the 12 steps? Well, let me tell ya' this up front: if you are not "in recovery" yourself, you have no validity and no business trying to help those who are. You are an outsider. You've never walked their walk, struggled with those issues, looked the demon of addiction in the eye. This protocol applies to not only the kids in the program, but the staff. I get it...
So there are only two ways to connect during the breaks between meetings: smoking or caffeinating. Since there is no way on God's green earth that I would smoke, I chose the road less traveled: a strong cup of dark, fudgy coffee. Now this is the el cheapo crap. It is not even Maxwell House, it is like, um, Maxwell Shack, or Maxwell Cardboard Box. And yes, it literally put hair on my chest. But you know what? Those little court-ordered punks listened when I facilitated group with a cup in my hand, and the staff laid off of me, and I only hated the unpaid internship HALF as much as I did initially!

Fast forward to 2003 when I'm employed as an in-home therapist for children on the brink of being shipped off to residential programs and juvenile detention. Starbucks is on the way to work and my boss introduces me to venti caramel macchiatos, which give me the energy to power through another job day after day that is a poor fit. Then my pants start to get tight and I cannot make the connection between this event and the extra 1,200 calories per day that I'm consuming. Finally resolve to stop drinking this sugar-laden confection and immediately drop 12 lbs within 2 months. Yowza. Can't let that happen again, better stick to regular old coffee.

Somewhere in this time frame my mother-in-law shows me an excerpt from a book on nutrition explaining that caffeine consumption can cause a myriad of problems, including decreased brain function. Or something like that. I don't exactly remember. Probably becuz drinking cafee mad me dum. (: I am mildly concerned but determine that what I lose in the smarts department, can be made up for in the extra energy department.

In 2007 I find out that I'm pregnant and have to cut out coffee cold turkey during the 1st trimester. I'm very proud to say that I managed to cut it out while maintaining a moderately positive outlook on life. (Translation: thank goodness that pregnancy also induced exhaustion or I might have done bodily harm to anyone within 10 feet of me.)
Thankfully I had an open-minded group of physicians following my pregnancy, and they eventually agreed that I could have an occasional cup during the 2nd and 3rd trimesters. Perhaps it is because they didn't feel it would cause any harm. Or perhaps they noticed the pleading and desperate look in my eye. Or maybe the fact that I beat one of them over the head with those lovely stirrups until they said I could have "my precious" back. Details...

I am fully aware that crunchy-granola-mommies everywhere are gasping with horror! The poor caffeinated fetus! Aaaaagh! Seriously folks I don't claim to be all-natural-wholesome mommy. I try to be a better mom every day than I was the day before, but even homey has her limits, ok? I DO, however, make my own all natural baby food...does that earn me points? We'll save that redeeming fact for another post!

Fast forward to the present day. I am working full time in a position that averages 65+ hours per week. I bring my daughter to work with me every, single, day since the day she turned 6 wks old. I was even busting out the breastaurant at work for a while there, pumping and dumping the poisoned caffeine boob milk! Dangit! Throw some vanilla in there and Starbucks might market it as a latte for $3.89! Presenting the new, all-natural (insert drumroll here.....) Boobaccino!!! Obviously it would be marketed primarily to males.

It is a blessing to bring her, yes, but honestly I get NOTHING DONE! The real work begins when I get home and sometimes hubby can watch her. That is, if hubby is not in his MBA class that is 2 nights per week. Not complaining, just further justifying the addiction!

I've really tried to hate Starbucks. They are "THE MAN", the "establishment", the one putting the little guys out of business. There is actually a cute little coffee shop right around the corner from my house and I gave it a shot, really I did! I had visions of the saying "Morning Missy! Do you want your usual drink while you sit on our inviting red leather couch with your cell phone on silent and peruse the local paper for fun family activities do to this weekend?" Unfortunately, not so much. Because their coffee tastes like heinie! As the rehab boys explained to mem if you were hooked on crack, a Xanax just wouldn't cut it.

Nope, I'll feed my addiction anonymously via drive-thru, while rushing into work, baby snoozing in the back, cell phone attached to my ear listening to coworkers complaining about each other and asking me to fix years of dysfunction that has nothing to do with me, save the fact I supervise them both! But there is some great coffee at the end of the line, dangit, and it's MINE! All MINE!

And I'm fully aware that a day of financial reckoning is coming soon...at which time I will have to resort to desperate lengths to raise money to fund the caffeine addiction. Dave Ramsey can bite me. But until that time....

Let me be happy in my slightly altered state, with my Starbucks grande coffee with 3 Splendas and nonfat milk in hand. There will definitely be a smile on my face, and that is sometimes difficult to come by in these hectic days!

While we're on the topic of the 12 steps, remind me to blog later about how everyone and their dog from my past has decided to hunt me down to include me in their Step #9. You cannot make this stuff up folks! Thank goodness I'm well caffeinated and can handle it!

Memorial weekend in Greensboro, NC

2008-05-27T23:34:00.000-04:00

I'm too exhausted to use my words. That's what you ask little kids to do when they're whining, right? Use their words? I just can't. Only-child-overwhelmed-by-big-family syndrome. It's a diagnosis. Look it up if you don't believe me! (: We had a great time visiting with all of Johnny's family members that came into town and now we are going to recover from all the visiting by sleeping. A lot.

One of our first stops was Guilford Courthouse National Military Park. This is a place that is very special to Johnny, as he spent the vast majority of his youth marching around in Revolutionary War attire during reenactments. Here's Daddy giving Hania her first lesson in colonial heritage with a tri-cornered hat. She looks psyched.

We walked all around the Hoskins House at Tannenbaum Park in Greensboro. This is where the British began their attack at the battle of Guilford Courthouse.

Itty Bit really enjoyed the diorama. It is huge and has thousands of pieces (ie little dudes, horses, trees, buildings) depicting the battle with a light and sound display. Johnny has always wanted to create a diorama of part of this battle. I am fully prepared to find that some day when I come home from work, he will have sold all of our possessions to fund this venture.

Hania chillin' under the statue of Nathaniel Greene, whom Greensboro, NC is named after. We met up with Johnny's friend Don Saunders who knows EVERYTHING about the Revolutionary War in the south.

Later in the weekend we returned with his parents and our niece, Grace, to walk the trails there.

Hania met all of her great-aunts, starting with Rhonda....

And Debbie...

And Dottie... all from South Carolina.

Hania adores her cousin Grace. She's six and was my shadow.

This is one of the main reasons for my exhaustion. Excessive hula-hooping, soccer playing, gymnastics, trampoline jumping, racing, crafting, and toe nail painting. Don't try to keep up with a six year old. You will LOSE.

Grace and Lord Destructo aka "cousin" Jackson. He is the little boy of Johnny's best friend from high school, and they came by to visit for a while. Trouble times two but so adorable.

Uncle Kevin (Johnny's brother), Johnny, and "Uncle" Ken (his best friend from high school). They spent several hours tripping down memory lane while looking at all of the childhood toys that the family had put away in the attic. SOMEONE was especially excited to find Optimus Prime, the Millenium Falcon, and the Ewok Village in great condition. So many of their toys had burn marks from gun powder used to blow them up while playing war. This is another reason God gave me a girl.

Hania playing with "Aunt" Laura. We were just grateful the guys didn't try to make us play Talisman.

The brothers and their little girls.

The family of three.

Four generation picture of Hania, Johnny, his mother Carolyn, and his grandmother Ruth.

This is the first time Hania met her great-grandparents, Ruth & Bob Oswald. They were headed back to Charleston, SC from visiting family in New York. I wish their dog Buffy could have been in the picture. All three of them have matching hair styles. It is undeniably cute.

Bop (grandpa) and his two granddaughters.

Whaddya think?

2008-05-21T13:33:00.000-04:00

I'll have to ask the forgiveness of my fellow bloggers, as this has been one of the craziest weeks I've had in a very long time. Work-wise, that is. The routine at home is starting to fall into place little by little...either that, or I've just decided that I have to become more lax and let things slide, or I will completely unravel! Hania has been busy chasing the oh-so-elusive Notorious Cat Brothers in her walker. They have learned how to stay just out of reach now that she mastered grabbing fur!

I have been meaning to post these pics for a while now for comparison, just for funsies.
People always ask the following question about Hania:
Q: "Who does she look like?"
A: The jury's still out on this one, because I think she resembles both of us, depending on her mood. What do you think? Check out the shots of Mommy and Daddy below at about the same age that Hania is here. Depending on what your comments tell us, there might be a margarita or chocolate shake riding on this bet! And believe me, I will be in need of both said items while visiting my in-laws this weekend!

Hania at around 5 months.

Daddy (he says that he thinks he looks like baby Tom Hanks here)

Mommy (You see that crooked smile? Yeah, it still comes out to visit after I've had a couple of margaritas or when something really cracks me up)

So whaddya think? Or does she just look like Hania Irene?

Mother's Day weekend recap

2008-05-16T01:38:00.000-04:00

I was trying to wait on this post until I received my parents' pictures on a disk, as they are always far better than mine! BUT...I couldn't wait! Of course there will be more later. In the meantime, I have discovered how to link words to websites! I'm outta control folks! Lotsa links!

My parents drove 11 hours from Texarkana to spend the weekend with us, and it was wonderful to see them, as usual. It was especially nice to be with my own mama on my first Mother's Day.

Saturday we spent the day doing two of my favorite activities: #1 hiking, & #2 eating.

I can't believe that we haven't taken a trip to Bernheim Forest sooner! My gosh, it was a gorgeous expanse of land located just about 20 minutes south of our house. And to think I've driven past it at least 2 times a week for the past 2 years...how did we not make the effort? There are a wide variety of hikes, educational exhibits and information on renewable resources. We decided to start with a short hike because Hania is new to this whole hiking business, and we weren't sure what she would think.
The fam of 3 in front of the visitor center. Can you see the grass planted on the TOP of the roof? To check out how/why, click here.

A friend of mine was recently asking about which baby carrier people prefer, and my favorite is the Ergo. My mom discovered this one and it was a life-saver on our first plane ride. I felt like it protects and supports her well enough without compromising her ability to look around and interact with her environment. It did not, however, protect our fellow flight passengers from being assaulted with her stuffed bunny "Ittybit" that she was waving wildly. She's much older and wiser now, and wouldn't dream of pulling that stunt again. But now she has non-breastmilk poop, so I think that we'll be assaulting other passengers' senses in other new and exciting ways! Part of my mother's day gift from Johnny is a Kelty. I cannot wait to use it, there are so many exciting features and it will be good for longer and more rugged hikes. Daddy did good!

After the hike we went to Lynn's Paradise Cafe, which is known equally for their amazing southern food and horrifically tacky decor. You can't fully see in this picture but absolutely nothing matches, there is a tree in the middle of the restaurant with colorful kites hanging off of it, and mannequin legs in brightly colored tights adorn the wall above the booths. The exterior has such tasteful delights as a tall concrete kitty, silk flowers stuck into the window boxes, and a bear dressed like Elvis. But the food is amazing! As my mom says "This is a Missy-place". A little "off" but the substance makes up for the exterior of silliness, right? They are famous for their hot browns and they were indeed delicious! I think I enjoy this place so much because it reminds me of so many of the restaurants in Austin, TX. Ya'll know how I feel about Austin.

Good people, please help me out. What on earth is wrong with me? I am normally a mild-mannered new mother that is basically an introvert until I reeeealy get to know someone. What possesses me to hop atop a fake cow at any opportunity and pretend to ride it? Seriously, there is a pattern here. Maybe there is a 12-step program for this affliction.
See the time line below to assist me in figuring out where this all began:

1977-1995 Born and raised in Mexico, Missouri. Live in a rural area but parents are not farmers. My dad plants a mean garden and taught me how to fish, my mom can cook anything and has a green thumb, my granny makes strawberry preserves. That is about as country as it got. We don't even listen to country music. Didn't raise rabbits or sheep for 4-H. One dance recital I'm forced to dance to the song "Achey Breaky Heart" and feel deeply ashamed that I secretly love the song. I am officially a "country-poser".
1996 One summer during college I go to a country bar and decide that riding the mechanical bull is a good idea. Apparently this is a hidden talent waiting to be unleashed and I am cheered on by a bar full of drunk cowboys.
1997 Another summer during college I have a job babysitting 3 rowdy children that actually live in a real farm. With real animals. That scare the crap out of me. One day I venture into the pen (or is it enclosure? fenced-off area?) and get chased by a bull. Maybe it was a cow, but either way it was big, and fast, and didn't want me there. Decide I'll stick to the mechanical version.
1998 Junior year spring break in Cancun. Another mechanical bull experience, but this time alcohol is involved. And there are girls there who are far more experienced in riding things than I am! I'm thrown off pretty quickly and land at the feet of the one guy that I was really hoping NOT to see in Cancun...with my dress around my waist. Klassy with a K.
1999-2007 Reside in some pretty "country" locations (Texas, Georgia & Kentucky) but manage to suppress my country-poser instincts until I see my husband riding one of these, mowing the church lawn. Yowza. Yes, to quote the song, I think his (or the church's) tractor is sexy. The virus spreads quickly this time, and soon I am listening to country music again, more comfortable on foster home visits that involve chickens running around my car, and find myself dreaming of living on more than 1/8 of an acre of land. Which leads us the present time, and my propensity towards "riding" concrete cows.
The first step is admitting that you have a problem, no?

Poohma and Poohpa posing with Miss Wonderful.

Mommy posing with Miss Wonderful and the gorgeous flowers that my parents gave me for Mother's Day.

"Nekkid" 7 month old baby!

Clothed 7 month old baby!

Hope that everyone had a fabulous Mother's Day! More pics to come...

Talk Derby to me

2008-05-12T23:07:00.000-04:00

Get it? Like the Poison song circa 1987? I can't take credit for this little pun; it is the saying on a popular t-shirt that is sold in KY around Derby time. It tickles me to see little kids wearing this shirt because they have absolutely NO idea what is so funny about it, but their parents probably do. Also tickles me because I was only about ten when the song came out. What does NOT tickle me is that poor Bret Michaels has to do a reality tv show to find his "Rock of Love". And who the hell says something "tickles them"? I have been in the South too long.

Here are overdue pics from the Derby party that we went to last weekend in our neighborhood. Now this is not the first time I've posted about our awesome neighbors, and some of your are probably going to want to barf hearing about it again, but we got LUCKY moving here! Once warm weather arrives there are always at least 2-3 families hanging outside after work every evening. Which makes it really easy to get to know everyone, and I swear that they are some of the most genuinely nice people I've ever met. Their advice and support throughout pregnancy and the first 7 months has been so valuable!

This is Debbie. She and her husband Roxie are brave for hosting the Derby party. She is soliciting funds to repair the impending damage to her home. Kidding! She organized the betting for each race and had great prizes for each win, place and show, as well as games and race-related toys for the kiddos. Not to mention tons of food. My contribution was supposed to be a double chocolate pound cake, however Miss Bad Dog decided that she didn't think we needed the entire cake so she ate the half closest to the edge of the counter. There is no photo evidence of this event, which is probably for the best. I turned into a raving lunatic for about 10 minutes.

Betting can be somewhat complicated. Gina and Julie are checking out the stats before placing a bet. (ummm, I feel like I'm writing captions for the jr high newspaper or something! sorry!)

Jenny is taking up bets for "last place" in the final Derby race. What's up with the light half/dark half of her face? Is that good vs evil? She is trying to convince Rochelle that she could win big if she picked the loser out.

I normally don't post pics of people's children without their permission, because not everyone is comfortable with their pics floating around the blogosphere. Personally, as a social worker, I'm freaked out by the general public every time I leave the house, so the internet is the least of my worries. Anyway.... this is Mr. Jenny with their youngest child. This is his alias, of course.

Jen, Erin and Rochelle.
If you want the straight scoop on parenting, ask Jen. She might have been the only one who was honest and was willing to discuss the good and the bad. Thanks, Jen. You are a true Northerner, and I appreciate that about you! Thankfully, some of your poop stories will not apply because I have a little girl. Right? Just humor me and say yes.
On a side note linking back to Bret Michaels, Erin and her husband watched Rock of Love with us every week for the past two seasons. Sometimes you have to tell on other people to make yourself feel better, ok?

Mr. Erin, Mr. Julie, Mr. Missy & Mr. Jen. All aliases. To protect their superhero identities, of course. They just finished cornholing. Yes, that is a verb here in Kentucky. Mr. Erin owns some cornhole boards. Mr. Missy and I had never heard of this game until we moved here... Apparently we totally missed this developing phenomenon while living in Georgia and Texas.

Jen attempts to protect Debbie's itty bitty dog from the children hopped up on my chocolate cake. (Clarification: I did NOT serve them the part that the dog ate off of. I did, however, cut the part she didn't eat into 1/2 inch slices to salvage it. Understandably, many of you will never eat from my kitchen again.)

Mr. Erin says "dang, you weren't kidding when you said she had a tooth!"

And the grand finale:
The party ended with one of Debbie and Roxie's children ordering a pay-per-view porn. Whoo-hoo! This little guy was flipping channels around to see the available movies, and accidentally ordered a $10 version of "Topless Girls on Bulls". He wasn't even sure that he'd done something wrong until every adult in the room gasped simultaneously. THEN he knew he'd done something fabulously naughty! Julie raced over and tried to cover up the tv, and the rest of us hollered for his parents to help us figure out the remote. Meanwhile, the actors and actresses on the film were "talking Derby" to one another. Looks like everyone caught the Derby spirit!

First Derby hat

2008-05-09T01:01:00.000-04:00

Every girl has to have a Derby hat. Actually we are cheating and this is a sun hat that she received from the Easter Gator, but we have to be practical considering that this child will burn if the sun even thinks about shining on her. Giving me a fair-skinned, red-headed daughter must be God's way of playing a prank of my ex-sun-worshiping a#@.

How is this thing attached to my head?

I ask you, can she BE any cuter?

Maybe the dingo ate your baby...

I know, I know, super gross! Please don't call child protective services, I'd rather just self-report and be done with it! They owe me some favors anyway. I was focusing the camera and Hania was shrieking at the dog when Keira just ran up and laid one on her! I'd be lying if I said that did not happen on a daily basis...

Derby Week - aka "Backside expansion project courtesy of hot apple dumplings"

2008-05-09T00:13:00.000-04:00

The weeks before Derby are a BIG DEAL in Louisville. It is pronounced "Luh-vull" for those who are not from around these here parts. There are literally daily activities for a month prior, and everyone uses the opportunity to get outside and celebrate spring (read: skip work). There are hot air balloon races, an air show, a big parade, riverboat races, you name it. The kids even get out of school on the Friday before Derby for "Oaks Day" - this is when the fillies race. A filly is a girl horse. Mainly locals and really cool people go to Oaks. Cool people who know other cool people that get them tickets. But I digress.

The big kick-off is Thunder Over Louisville, which is a gigantic fireworks display over the Ohio River that is advertised as the largest fireworks event that takes place in the U.S. (Can that be correct?) We haven't gone during the 3.5 yrs we've lived here, because a) you pretty much have to camp out to get a good spot, b) it takes like 5 hrs to get home afterwards in the traffic, and c) oh yes, I'm too old and cranky to be patient for that kind of thing! Light me up some sparklers, black snakes and fountains in the back yard and we'll just call it a day, allright? Can't take the country out of the girl...

One of the best activities is the Chow Wagon. This would be tents and vendors set up near the waterfront of the Ohio River, and is glorified fair food with a performance stage and some cheesy little stores selling Derby knick knacks. It is the perfect opportunity to skip work. So off we went - 4 coworkers and 2 infants in strollers, just out to enjoy the day. Actually, DeShawn looked like he had a harem. Which might explain why he ran away from us once he escorted us to the Chow Wagon. Or perhaps he just got lost on the hunt for his elusive $11 turkey leg. Our feelings were hurt, but we soothed ourselves with hot apple dumplings, corn dogs, and bloomin' onions.

Have you ever seen someone so excited about a darn batter-fried vegetable? My coworker Katherine is a riot. And a darn fine case manager!
I can't make fun of her excitement, as I basically jumped up and down and clapped with joy when I saw someone's apple dumpling, and then determined to make it mine!

Monique and Arial look like ladies here. Don't be fooled. Ms. M can take out a corn dog like nobody's business!

This is how Hania spent most of her time at the Chow Wagon. I think we all felt about this tired on the way home from all of the junk we ate.

After the Chow Wagon they were both ready to play. Check out Hania's daisy dukes and Arial's blingy belt. They can't believe they didn't get junk food!

Scenes from Sunday afternoon

2008-05-05T23:15:00.000-04:00

Taking pictures on Sunday, May 4th.

Hania is so sweet and happy in her little pink dress. What a little lady!

"If I pose nicely can I get my hands on that cell phone?"

Mommy gives her the cell phone so that she can "talk" to Poohma and Poohpa.

Sending text messages to foreign countries.

"Tastes delightful and feels good on my gums. How have I gone an entire SEVEN MONTHS without one of these things?"

And then the phone is unjustly taken away from the little lady.
Which leads to one of Hania's first.....

wait for it.....

TANTRUMS!

It is cute now, but it might not be AS cute in a couple of years!

Celebrate National Foster Care Month!

2008-05-02T13:26:00.000-04:00

I suppose it is about time for a serious post, for once!

May is National Foster Care Month. Check out the link below for details:

http:www.fostercaremonth.org/Pages/default.aspx//

It is a neat overview of foster care. The site has a fabulous drop-down menu on the left under "Get Involved" that allows you to choose a way to help, whether you have 5 minutes or a lifetime to devote to children in need.

Foster care is a very special topic for me because I have worked in this field for the past 5 years. Most of you know this, but I'm employed as a treatment director for a locally based foster care program in Kentucky. The 3 offices I manage cover all of western KY and include about 60+ children and 45 foster families. The agency is specifically for "therapeutic" foster children, which means that they have been removed from their families due to often chronic abuse (physical and sexual) or extreme neglect. Being a foster parent is an incredibly difficult job, and the financial compensation does not even BEGIN to cover the emotional and financial toll that it could take on a family. But there are some amazing folks out there that feel called to foster, and I am so grateful that these caring individuals exist.

You probably see foster families every day and don't even realize it. Occasionally it is obvious, when you see a mother with a bazillion children of all different races, dragging them through the grocery store and some of them are screaming "you're not my mama!". That one's obvious. But normally they are just people going about their day, attempting to make this child comfortable despite the fact that they are in a completely new environment without one single friendly face that they recognize. I'm not saying that these kids are angels, by any means! There are many nights when I want to just relax with my husband and baby, and not take the midnight phone calls when a child is acting up, or a foster parent needs reassurance, but it comes down to this fact: negative life events = negative behaviors. Simple fact that I repeat to myself when I'm feeling overwhelmed by this job. Also, fostering can be an excellent route to adoption given the right circumstances. If anyone wants more info on fostering, just let me know and I'll be straight with you, the good and the bad. Or as Johnny says in a diva voice: "You tell it like it IS!" Could he be making fun of me? (:

Oh yeah, and if anyone is in the mood to send up a prayer, or some good karma or vibes to the universe, please remember the children and foster care workers dealing with this west Texas Yearning for Zion Ranch situation. I'm not expressing an opinion on it here, but let me just say that those workers are in OVER THEIR HEADS! I'm stressed out for them! There is no way they were prepared to handle the care and respect the culture and traditions of those children! Not saying they should not have been investigated, but the whole situation is tough.

On a happy note, the Kentucky Derby is tomorrow, which means there will be all kind of fun post-Derby party pics posted on Sunday/Monday!

Cackling Hania

2008-04-29T06:40:00.000-04:00

This video is a little late, but that's just how we roll around here....always a little late with good intentions!
It was taken at her 6-month check up on 4/11/08 and she was getting a little antsy so we had to resort to the oldest trick in the book - throwing the child around. She loves to fly! Check out her cackling (you can't even call that a laugh, she's cracking up!).

And then something funny that made ME laugh. For weeks, people, laughing for weeks. When I'm driving along in a foul mood about work, or I'm annoyed that the cat left a present outside the litter box, I think about this and it just makes me laugh.

Note to readers: this is a little crude and not exactly family friendly. Not that the children will "get it" but I had to warn you.

Conversation had with an acquaintance, regarding the doctor's news that Hania might have croup: (turns out she did not, but that is besides the point)

Lady: So how's Hania doing? Is she feeling better?
Missy: Yes, the doctor said she might have croup but we'll just have to see how her cough develops and if it worsens we'll take her back in.
Lady: Oh, the croup. Wow, that's awful. I had it once and man, it really burns so bad when you pee. It's just miserable.
Missy: (insert stunned silence here) Umm....
Lady: But they just give you some medicine and it's no big deal.
Missy: (reaching for something, anything to say when I realized that this acquaintance not only confused croup with the clap, but that she disclosed her personal experience about it.)
Great. Well, uh, gotta run.

Wow. That's all I have to say about that, Enjoy that little snippet of my life in Kentucky!
Wish you were here to share in my many delightful cultural experiences!

Guess who's still here?

2008-04-26T15:19:00.000-04:00

Yes, that is a look of perpetual guilt. Maybe she was raised Catholic or something.
K-Doggy Dogg has endeared herself, as usual, just in the nick of time.
Hania now giggles uncontrollably at her and reaches out for her. Dang. No farm for K-Dogg.
Plus, she hasn't eaten any underwear or baby clothes lately. Keira, not Hania.

Letter of gratitude

2008-04-24T14:15:00.000-04:00

Dear inventors of the Brights Start Around We Go Activity Center:
http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2651028

Thank you for helping this busy mother to maintain her sanity. If I ever meet you in the flesh, do not be shocked if I throw myself at your feet and declare my undying love. Initially I was again infant incarceration systems, but all standards were out the window by 6 wks of age when I returned to work. My daughter now plays in this center for at least 15 minutes, twice a day. This has allowed me to do the following unthinkable activities:

1. Cook semi-healthy meals that involve more than just the microwave.
2. Prepare homemade baby food, which my daughter thanks you for, with the exception of
steamed green beans, because honestly, who really eats those without some butter and salt?
Kidding!
3. Shave my legs at least twice a week. My husband thanks for you for one as well. He was
beginning to think he married the wolf-man's hot sister.
4. Use the flat iron at least once a week, so that my post-pregnancy frizzy hair frightens small
children only 6 days of the week.
5. Pee.

Thank you also for teaching my daughter the following important things:

1. Various genres of music to shake her groove thang to (ie jazz, classical, hip hop, salsa, and
reggae).
2. A little ingenuity can go a long way. (Hania was not tall enough to go around using her feet, so
she pulled with her hands from one activity to another).
3. Beginning wake-boarding skills using the little life raft that can be pulled behind the little
plastic boat.

I will recommend your product to anyone and everyone that will listen.
Thanks again,
your new BFF,
Missy

Where's my stunt double?

2008-04-22T06:27:00.000-04:00

So this is Hania's latest trick that we've discovered. She loves to pull herself up using your hands. Of course we are thrilled because this is the precursor to walking, but also terrified because, well, it is the precursor to walking! Initially we gave her a significant amount of help, but now she can pull to standing by herself.
We have not started to childproof the house yet. Good thing there is that tax stimulus refund on the way...have you priced some of the items needed to childproof a home? Good gracious.

Notice the self-proclaimed feminist unwittingly using the phrase "good girl" which reinforces society's belief that a girl's self-worth is based on her ability to be docile, non-challenging, and color within the lines at all times. Hopefully Hania will forgive me. Blame it on exhaustion. Note to self: do not subconsciously reinforce stereotypical sexist messages to six month old.

She definitely could use a stunt double.

Other interesting things this week:

* Made a trip to the doctor yesterday because she was pulling on her ear and was extremely
fussy. We received 2 diagnoses: 1) Mommy is an overreactive dumba@# and thought it was
an ear infection, & 2) Hania is teething! She has a sharp little lower front tooth poking
through! In our defense, Hania has been showing signs of teething for 3 months now, so I just
never imagined it was finally breaking through!

* The Schmonsees grandparents came for a weekend visit. We had a nice time just hanging out,
which gave me time to organize her closet and Johnny studied for his final next week.

* Spring has sprung around Kentucky! We planted tulips, daffodils and grape hyacinths about 2 years ago, and they have come up beautifully every year since. LOVE LOVE LOVE bulbs! So much payoff for very little initial work.

Happy Happy Spring!!!

Is it "Da-da"?

2008-04-22T06:13:00.000-04:00

Look what Hania started doing last night...

Allright, we need some help from our "readers" (all 5 of you!)
Is this sweet child saying "Da-da"? We sure would like to think it is, but since this is our first round of parenting, we might be overzealous!

She has been moving her jaw like this for the past week and suddenly this just came out! She is playing in her round-and-round (well, that's what we call it) in our bathroom while I ransack my cabinets to prepare for the church yard sale. She just started saying it, and I yelled for Johnny to come see his child prodigy.

So funny that she sounds exasperated! Johnny says that is because she is used to hearing Mommy refer to Daddy in that tone. I have no idea what he is taking about. I am a patient and kind individual that only speaks in loving tones to my family. Ha!

Six Month Photos

2008-04-17T20:54:00.000-04:00

Hania on the morning of her Six Month Birthday....April 11, 2008.

My mom used to wake me up by saying "It's time to start your happy day!!!" in a really loud, cheerful voice. I am not a morning person. This phrase still haunts me. Apparently Hania is, though, because this is how she wakes up every, single day. With a genuinely happy smile on her sweet little face! I might smile too, if I had slept for 9 hours and someone monitored my comfort using a video camera.

Below is Hania at the doctor's office, before her 6 month shots. She took them like a trooper and the office staff is great, but it still breaks your heart to see the real tears streaming down her face!

Daddy, why are you tickling me?

Some people say their infants are fussy or sleep all day after shots, but Hania was ready to play.
She has picked Crusoe as "her kitty". It is obvious that she focuses on him when he walks by, and reaches out to grab him, opening and closing her hands. He is the only one of our four cats (yeah, you read that right, we have a mini-zoo here. We might require a permit, but who's counting?) that would lay next to her when she was very little, and wasn't scared. She also has a "kitty voice" that is soft and gentle, as opposed to her her usual form of communication, which is screaming or screeching! Crusoe camped out in her laundry hamper and she thought it was hilarious. They played through the mesh bag for quite a while.

Anyone up for a tennis match?

Maybe this is why these two bonded... perhaps Hania's bottles remind him of his kittenhood. He and his brother Big-Tony-the-kitty-mob-boss (to be said with a Joisey accent, as in "fuhgeddaboutit!") were rescued from a foster home in October 2006. Crusoe was so pitiful and had to be bottle fed for several weeks. The foster mother was just planning to let nature take it's course and let coyotes eat them, but I couldn't let that happen. I also know that foster mom is a little nutso. As in, gave me a beautiful study Bible as a gift and then told me that I needed it more than anyone she'd ever met. REALLY? Apparently she doesn't get out much, because I'm pretty tame these days. Even better, she told the foster kids I was a whore b/c I wore eyeliner. LOVE. MY. JOB. The rewards are endless, I tell ya! Don't you know that I wore liquid eyeliner every time I went to their house after that? AND lip gloss for good measure, to show her who's boss! What a rebel.
I have a million funny foster care stories, but I won't relate them all at once because you would laugh so darn hard that you'd spit your coffee/soda/milk out of your nose. And I wouldn't want to be responsible for that. It is not modeling good behavior for your children.
Now I'm getting a little fired up thinking about this nasty lady, so I'm going to look at the cute picture of little bottle-fed kitty and count to ten! Pet owners have a decreased risk of heart disease, did you know that? If this is true, then Johnny and I should be so calm that we're CAT-atonic! Get it? Funny girl for late on a Thursday night!

Awwww....

About 6 months ago right now...

2008-04-11T02:58:00.000-04:00

I looked like this! Hania's 6 month birthday is today at 11:34 am! It feels like she has been with us for much longer that just 6 months.

My water broke sometime after 2am when I managed to finally lay down to rest. I distinctly recall feeling my water break (no mistaking that feeling!) and lapsing into my typical procrastination/denial mode and thinking: "dang, I'm really not ready to deliver her yet because I still haven't finished that client's assessment, and my cute hoodie isn't finished drying yet, and I don't want my parents/in-laws to see how dirty the carpets are." Wow.

This pic is around 3am after I'd showered, attempted to use the flat iron between contractions, and painted my toenails. Because that's the important stuff, right?

I'll spare you the details of the delivery, but here is little Hania at around 1 minute old:

Again, the denial kicked in when I saw them lay her momentarily on my stomach, and I thought: "That cannot be MY big, red-headed baby!" Nevermind that silly umbilical cord attached, I just wasn't quite sure she was ours! (For some reason, my mind painted a vision of her as a dark haired baby, and the doctor's assured me that she would be quite small according to their measurements.) Johnny just kept saying "oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh". I don't think he was referring to my newly painted toenails, either.

A team of nurses whisked her away to do more thorough suctioning because she had swallowed some fluid during her trip down the birthing water slide. Thankfully I couldn't see them sticking a long tube down into her throat repeatedly, but Johnny did. And it really freaked him out for obvious reasons. She was just fine after a couple of minutes, and then they handed her to us and then we were....alone. With a baby. Our baby. That we have to feed and change and protect and educate and teach to read and ride a bike and give amazing life experiences to. Holy CRAP!
And she's going to want to go to Mardi Gras and South Padre for spring break someday!
No no no!

Do we look shell shocked? That's because we were. And still are. But we're getting the hang of it and have enjoyed so many wonderful moments with little Hania. Happy 6 Month Birthday little girl!
We'll post an official 6 month photo later today!

Salt & Pepa

2008-04-11T01:19:00.001-04:00

Can you handle this cuteness? If in doubt, you might want to stop scrolling down about now, because it is pretty darn cute... My mom got matching outfits for Hania and Arial (aka Salt & Pepa OR Ebony & Ivory) and we did an impromptu photo shoot. Yes, we are supposed to be working. But Monique and I get more done on a bad day than most folks do all week... I'm just saying.

Future AKA's. If you don't know why this is funny to say Hania is a future AKA, then you have not lived in Atlanta.

These shots say it all: Hania is just observing everything casually, staring into the camera (poor child probably thinks something is amiss if a day goes by WITHOUT a camera in her face) and Arial is into EVERYTHING! Looking around, checking things out, nothing gets by this little girl!

Only 2 months apart! Hania is a bit of a chunk, and Arial is very petite. Both wearing their new shoes. Thanks to Monique for trying to corral two wild things! I told her she looked like a natural holding two babies, so when was the 2nd one on the way. Then she cussed me out. Just kidding! She's a lady, so she just rolled her eyes. (: But she was possibly cussing me out in her mind.

I cannot believe how long it has been since the last entry. Slacking, I tell ya! Actually not. Life is just going full speed ahead, as usual. I'll try to hit the high points:

* Returned home from our trip to Texarkana and still trying to get caught up on housework/laundry/organizing. It is not humanly possible. Johnny is giving everything he has and so am I. Disaster imminent. Must teach cats to scoop their own litter boxes. Teaching Hania to do her laundry is on the weekend to-do list. She really hasn't been pulling her weight around here lately. All 16 lbs, 1 oz.

* Seriously considering taking Keira to live on a farm with one of our foster families. This is a heart breaking decision to make, but we are trying to weigh if she would be happier living without a fence and with 12 kids to pay her endless attention. Even if the kids are hellions. But she could always just eat them if they get too wild. But that would require me to do more "critical incident" paperwork, as well as add "eaten by dog" to the checklist of common incidents.
* Started my new position, which is really the same position but double the caseload and 2 more offices to oversee, plus at least one day per week of travel. Still bringing Hania 4 days per week.

* Mucho job drama....this section has been edited to protect the not-so-innocent, and because you never know who is reading! I know I will look back on this years later and laugh...right? RIGHT? (:

* Hania is making so much progress lately! A quick rundown: can hold her own 4 oz bottle; happily eats baby food (peas, carrots, sweet potatoes, squash, green beans); reaches out towards the kitties and dog attempting to grab their fur, fascinated by textures (ie fringe on the pillow, scratchy carpet, running water); sleeps in her big-girl crib upstairs with the monitor on at night; developed a hacking cough a week ago that might have been croup; loves to stomp her feet and jump while watching herself in the mirror; loves to play the "piano" on her exersaucer; sits up by herself and is developing a good sense of balance.

I think that about covers it! Will try to resume more frequent posts!!!

Happy (late) Easter pictures!

2008-03-27T02:50:00.001-04:00

Make a scrapbook - it's easy!

Ain't misbehavin'...

2008-03-22T12:14:00.001-04:00

Isn't that what you are supposed to do at the grandparents' house?
Hania has developed an aversion to clothing this week. So Poohma indulged her and unsnapped her onesies.

Then she ended up convincing them to take off her top, which doubled as a hat.

Hmm, it is a slippery slope to the nudist colony.

And eventually a diaper is just too confining! It is too nice and warm down here in the South to worry about clothes! Doesn't she look like she pulled a fast one and she knows it?

Apparently Hania isn't the only one misbehaving. Mommy is eating straight out of the pan. They are rice crispy treats with milk chocolate chips and coconut, a real blast from my childhood past. Sorry Johnny, we don't make these at our house because I can't control myself. But all rules are out the window on vacation!

Over the river and through the woods...

2008-03-22T11:44:00.000-04:00

to the Byerly Grandparents' house we go! Poohma doesn't look happy to see us, does she?
She is looking for IttyBit, her little bunny that rode in the front pocket of the baby carrier. I can't say enough good things about this Ergo baby carrier.

Hania was a fabulous traveler on the 2 flights from Louisville to Little Rock. She was a little fussy in the terminal in Louisville, and I kept promising my fellow waiting passengers around me that I would try not to be "that lady" with the screaming baby! Thankfully most of them were parents and grandparents themselves, and one nice guy from Connecticut helped me mix a bottle up. Happy to report that she didn't even cry for a second on the plane! Her bottle and pacifier helped her to pressurize her ears during the flight. However she did assault a 75 yr old lady sitting next to us by flailing her arms and beating her with IttyBit. The lady then informed me that she was a retired teacher and she chose not to have children because they were "intolerable". We might have been her worst nightmare, but she made a valiant effort to be nice to us.

The Byerly Grandparents were waiting in Little Rock with a HUGE bunny balloon attached to the travel system that they bought for her. Seriously, it had to take a lot of effort for them to get everything all set up for us and we appreciate it! They had no clue what a hit the balloon was going to be. Hania was completely obsessed with it, and it is probably the first item that she has reached out for (well, other then a bottle).

Shiny, happy Pooh Bear!

Poohpa was literally skipping with the stroller to the car. Poor neglected child with no one to love her.

And this is only the first hour in Arkansas...

Palm Sunday and the Ides of March

2008-03-16T14:44:00.001-04:00

Well, we've dressed Hania up for a bit chilly Palm Sunday. She looked so lovely in the Springtime outfit that Grandma Schmonsees gave her. We took some pictures as soon as we got home from church, as Hania seemed to still have some good smiles left in her before nap time.

This was a big week for Hania for another reason, as well: she started eating vegetables! We started her on peas this past Wednesday, and she actually really liked them! What a relief. Here are some great shots of her enjoying this delightful new dish.

This is all a great lead-in for her big adventure that starts tomorrow (Monday). She'll get on the big plane and head south for a visit with Grandma and Grandpa Byerly in Texarkana. They've got loads of wonderful things planned for the little one on her first Spring Break! What a great time she'll have. Mommy has been working on everything necessary to make it a smooth trip down there. There is a lot of planning involved when you take a young infant on a big trip like that, especially when you haven't done it before. Just getting through the airport system is the biggest hurdle, I think.

Yesterday was the 15th of March. This was the 227th anniversary of the Battle of Guilford Courthouse. I grew up in Greensboro, NC, and spent a lot of time learning about that battle. When I was in high school, I learned what it meant to the overall situation in the Revolutionary War and North Carolina. Greensboro, for instance, is one of several cities named after the American commander in the battle, Nathaniel Greene (a new statue of him will be unveiled on March 26th!).

Later at West Point, I learned about the importance of the leaders on both sides, and the decisions that they made. I also learned about how important some of the tactics were, and what the impact was to the rest of the conflict. I think that we forget about how important the people and the conflict were to what we are as a country today. I heard a Civil War historian say recently that the Revolutionary War generation was considered the "Greatest Generation" by those that fought in the War Between the States. If you want to learn more about the Battle of Guilford Courthouse in a short, easy-to-read book that will, if you have any interest in this subject matter whatsoever, inspire you learn more about that war and the period it was fought in, click on this link: Another Such Victory.

I'm going to try to cover some of the Revolutionary War history that I find very interesting and relevant as we go through the year. I'll include pictures and links as I can find good ones.

Missy will be posting more this week as she and Hania start their Crosby/Hope-style road trip. We are really looking forward to seeing it all.

Winter Weekend Escapades

2008-03-11T19:51:00.001-04:00

This is what we saw on our deck Saturday morning. That's what we do instead of cleaning off our messy desk...we just wait for it to snow and cover it up!
It snowed all day for a grand total of 12 inches.

Look closely at the window on the far left. Do you see how the indoor blinds/shutters are out of whack? Our designer recommended that look. She is very exclusive and a bit of a trailblazer, so please don't hate on our customized look. Oh, you want her business card? Her name is Keira le'Dawg, and she can be reached at 1-800-DESTROY EVERYTHING OF VALUE IN THE HOME! (: All joking aside, we had plantation shutters installed in the dining room and Keira immediately tore them apart trying to "protect" the home from other dogs who had the audacity to walk by the house. That might have been on day 5 after they were installed. Lesson learned!

Hania was bundled up in a "vintage" snow suit (yes, mine from 1977!). This will make you feel old: this is the first time we've put this one on her because it doesn't have legs, it is just a big, warm sack. Why, you ask? Because children weren't required to be strapped into car seats in the 70's. She says that polyester is surprisingly warm!

Just hanging out in the street in front of the house. This is pretty much what it looks like all summer. Without the snow, that is. Our neighborhood is incredible, just in case I haven't written about that yet. There are a lot of young families on our section of the street and we tend to congregate for impromptu parties in the street. I'm not trying to get all Norman Rockwell on ya'll, but it is really amazing and it has made our time here in Kentucky much more fun. It truly is like a movie, and I doubt we would ever be this lucky again to find this many warm and caring people in one relatively small space. Funny this is, most of them aren't even from Louisville, which is probably why we've come to depend on each other so often. There is a little turnaround loop next to our home, so it is not unheard of during nice weather to pull into your driveway after work and find 5-10 neighbors and their kids congregated there! I'm sure there will be plenty more to write about these good folks once the snow melts, because we all feel a little isolated in the winter when we can't just meet up anytime we choose!

Hania is starting to become annoyed because the snow flakes are sticking to her eyebrows.

Big Tony, the little kitty mob boss.
Some of us enjoyed playing outside more than others.

Miss Delilah is one of those "others". We also call her Gurr because she growls like a dog. Doesn't she look so warm and luxurious here? If she were a Starbucks drink she'c be a "mocha-Gurrchino".

Daddy, when is it going to stop snowing?

Don't all three of them have a similar expression here?

Warming up and doing tummy time!

Chicken Cordon Bleu-me-away!

2008-03-10T02:59:00.000-04:00

Yep, I'm a dork. That title took me far to long to think up!

The little clock on my blog is wrong, it is actually 3am and I'm staying up to pump. (Sorry for the mental image, but I'm trying desperately to maintain my "supply", if ya get my drift! If you aren't a mama, then you aren't grossed out b/c you don't really know what I'm referring to. A year ago I would have though someone staying up to pump was lifting weights!)

Anyway...

Another fabulous recipe that I've been making frequently this winter:

Chicken Cordon Bleu
Also from Cooking Light, my favorite!
I'll just guess on amounts b/c you really cannot mess this one up.

4 thin chicken breasts (you can flatten yourself, but most stores sell them already flattened)
4 slices thin ham
4 slices cheese (swiss, provolone, mozzarella...they're all good)
Herbs (I use oregano, basil, parsley, rosemary, thyme)
Mixture of mayo and water
Bread crumbs
Toothpicks

Lightly season one side of flattened chicken breasts w/ any herbs you like, salt and pepper.
Place 1 slice of ham, 1 slice of cheese on the chicken breast.
Roll it up tightly, starting with one end. It is going to be imperfect, don't freak. Use a toothpick in each end to hold the roll together. (Or if you're me...attempt to roll chicken breast, push cat away so she doesn't lick chicken, pick up teething baby's pacifier w/ chicken juice fingers then realize you are going to contaminate the poor child, wash hands, push cat away again, make barricade of canisters so cat cannot pass through, play peek-a-boo behind the canisters so the baby doesn't cry, give her a teething ring using my elbows so as not to give her food poisoning, trip over dog, attempt to re-roll chicken, receive phone call from foster parent claiming that belligerent foster child must be picked up immediately, decide that I'll make double the amount so I don't have to do this again for at least 2 days, successfully re-roll chicken...ta da!!! Only 3 more to go.)
Brush each chicken roll with a mix of mayo and water.
Dredge each roll in breadcrumbs seasoned with herbs.
Place rolls in baking dish coated with cooking spray.
Bake 20 minutes at 325.

ENJOY! It looks really gourmet and is so delicious. You can stuff it with anything, I suppose. Next I'm going to stuff it with spinach, feta and sun dried tomatoes!

Tiramisu anyone?

2008-03-10T02:22:00.001-04:00

I know, a blog without photos is rather depressing. You can blame Blogger. I've been trying to post pics for over 24 hrs and still no luck. We have tons of fun pics in the snow, too. They're on the way...

In the meantime, I feel obligated to share this recipe with you.... White Russian Tiramisu.
Oh yeah, it is every bit as good as it sounds.
Warning #1: Your butt is going to hate me for sharing this with you. My butt wants your butt to share in it's misery! (: Actually it is from Cooking Light, so it could be worse.
Warning #2: Ingredients include coffee and Kahlua...BUT I'm happy to report that it is just as good if you make it using substitutions if you are avoiding those substances. I had to try it out to make sure, because literally every, single, dang recipe that is my favorite has liquor or wine in it. I'm not sure what that says about me, but moving on... And every time our LDS friends were coming over I was freaking the heck out trying to figure out how to substitute ingredients for the alcohol. Some turned out good and others....well, I'll just say that Miss K-Dog had a nice dinner that night! I'll list the substitutions beside the ingredients.

WHITE RUSSIAN TIRAMISU

1 1/2 cups strong brewed coffee (or decaf, or hot water w/ artificial coffee flavoring)
1/4 cup Kahlua (or use the same substitution liquid above, sweetened w/ several tsp of sugar)
8 oz fat free cream cheese, softened
3 1/2 oz regular cream cheese, softened
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
1/4 cup granulated white sugar
2 3oz packages of ladyfingers (they come split in half, found in the bakery)
3 tsp unsweetened cocoa

Make coffee and mix with 2 tsp Kahlua in a shallow dish. Cool. (yep, it IS cool, but I literally mean allow it to cool.)
Combine all cream cheese in a lg bowl. Beat w/ a mixer at high speed until smooth. Add sugars and 2 tbsp Kahlua, and beat until well blended.
Split ladyfingers in half lengthwise (they usually come already split)
Quickly dip 24 ladyfinger halves, flat sides down, into coffee mixture; placed dipped sides down in bottom of a deep baking dish, slightly overlapping the halves. Spread cheese mixture on top, and sprinkle with cocoa.
You can do as many layers as you'd like, depending on how big your dish is. (I prefer to do 3+ layers b/c it looks really pretty and fancy served up when it is cut into squares.)

Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate. The recipe says for 2 hrs but they are underachievers. It is waaaaay better chilled overnight because the coffee gets all cozy and lovey with the ladyfingers and it is crazy-good!

Warning #3: You are going to want to eat it right away. Really, I'm not joking. But don't. Please don't. Get a hold of yourself woman! (or man!) Say it with me: "I will not touch said tiramisu until it has time to fully chill." You know I'm telling this to myself right now, right? (:
It's not about you, it's ME.

Let me know how it turns out if you make it!
More recipes to come, I've been cooking up a storm this weekend.

Now THIS is winter!

2008-03-09T00:00:00.001-05:00

We should have known it was going to be a big snow storm when we already had 6 inches by Friday night... But this morning we awoke to a grand total of 12 inches, which is more snow that I've seen in a very long time! I'd forgotten how bright everything is when it's covered in a blanket of white, powdery, snowy goodness. This is the only time we've had more than 3 inches since moving to KY 3 yrs ago.

(I'm waiting on pictures to download... in the meantime, please enjoy this video of Keira attacking Johnny. Just kidding!)

She loves to run around the yard like a maniac in the snow. At the end of the video he tries to touch her face and she thinks he's playing with her, which results in much growling and jumping. I promise, no dog-daddies were harmed in the making of this video! It looks like a film made for a wildlife documentary...you know, the ones where the once-calm and accepting wild animals suddenly turn on the filmmaker. Johnny drops the camera down so K-dogger won't bite it, so it looks even MORE as if he was attacked!

Fierce! She's just a wolf-wannabe.

Byerly Grandparents Visit - the last installment!

2008-03-05T18:32:00.001-05:00

We like to take pictures. I'm not sure if you caught onto that.

A SMILE! A REAL SMILE! Pretty soon she might have some teeth to show off with that smile!

Another thing that should go on my review. Hanna Andersson clothing. LOVE IT. My folks got her some outfits for Christmas and they are very high quality, and wash up extremely well. Plus the onesies come with 2 sets of snaps in the crotch, and bands on the pants that can roll down or up to extend the time they can fit into them. Plus, they look like clothing a little baby should wear, not like some miniature Bratz doll. That is a big-time pet peeve of mine. But that's another blog post!

Oh yes, and her Uggs. Baby Uggs. I'm not kidding. Chalk that one up to the Byerly grandparents as well. They are quite possibly the cutest things I've ever seen, and so warm and cozy on a cold day.

I have some faux Uggs from Payless. Does that make them "Puggs"? ha!

She is finally able to sit up in her chair!

Hania can't wait to see her Poohma and Poohpa in March! 12 days and counting! Guess I'd better make my flight, huh?

Byerly Grandparents Visit - Birthday dinner

2008-03-05T18:11:00.001-05:00

To celebrate my 31st birthday, we all went for great Italian food at Ferd Grisante.

Family photo! Who do you think she looks like? We go back and forth on this one.

Poohma, Poohpa, Pooh-mama & Pooh. I wonder if Hania will think it's funny that she has grandparents that go by these names? (:

So stinkin' cute!!!!! This might be one of the first shots we got of her smiling for real!

Apparently Hania didn't get enough to eat. Poohpa doesn't seem to mind being a human teething ring.

Byerly Grandparents Visit - Play time!

2008-03-05T17:23:00.000-05:00

I don't know who played harder, Pooh or her grandparents!

The green guy is her Laughing Gator. Of course it a grandparent's obligation to bring loud toys! Being the brilliant little Pooh that she is, she's already learned how to make him laugh by grabbing his foot. Or do gators have paws? No, I don't think things with scales can have paws, right? Anyway, the gator doesn't just laugh...it guffaws! My coworkers are going to kill me...

Speaking of gators...my parents informed me that when Hania is visiting their house for Easter that the "Easter Gator" is going to bring her basket, so as not to compete with the Easter Bunny. I think this is too funny. And when she's old enough she can go to the pond at Poohpa's work and try to spot the 12 foot gator that dwells there. Don't mess with Texas - or their gators!

She adores this mobile! This should actually go with the product review (no, I didn't forget! just delayed by life!). It is made by Tiny Love and the animals look scary....reeeealllly scary! As in, "no way I'm buying that for her because it's going to give her nightmares" scary! But it had rave reviews on various sites and sure enough, it makes her so happy to lie down and talk with her friends on the mobile.

Byerly Grandparents Visit - Adventures with rice cereal

2008-03-05T16:56:00.001-05:00

Hania had her 1st rice cereal on 2/16/08. I was trying to wait until her grandparents arrived, but she was just too hungry!

Poohma attempts to feed the excited baby.

Obviously her mother didn't teach her to chew with her mouth closed!

Mommy and Daddy attempt to use a baby spoon.

Now I understand why parents say that you'll wish your children still used a bottle...it is EVERYWHERE!

Sorry Delilah! I don't think you'll like rice cereal, and you can't expect to kick the baby out of her seat every single day! (Actually the little kittens try to sneak a taste of the rice cereal because it looks and smells like kitten formula. They were bottle fed for several months and they tried to regress...I hear that sometimes happens with older "siblings"!)

Maple Syrup Festival

2008-03-02T14:51:00.000-05:00

Have you ever been to a maple syrup farm? Well, Hania has! We took her to the Indiana sugarbush festival in Salem, Indiana, at one of the southernmost maple syrup farms in the country. This was a great opportunity to meet up with some of our friends from GE, and to go to an activity together as a family. There are all-you can eat pancakes (we're in line for them in the first pictures below), a lot of living history-type displays with interpretive experts there to explain how maple syrup and other foods were made by early American settlers and Native Americans. George Washington loved pancakes, by the way, but he liked them smothered in honey! He obviously had not tried much maple syrup.

Here are a series of photos we took with Hania during the festival, and then afterward, once she had collected her bounty of syrup, and smuggled it across state lines into Louisville.

Visit from the Byerly Grandparents - the first 5 minutes!

2008-02-28T10:59:00.000-05:00

Hania's Poohma & Poohpa came to visit last weekend! These are just a few of the pictures taken in the first 5 minutes that they arrived...notice they are still in the entry way of our house.

Just in case you can't tell, my family is fanatical about pictures. If you've been there to share any of the major events in my life (oh you know, like prom, graduation from high school or college, holidays, eating spaghetti on a random Tuesday night...) there MUST be pictures! MANY pictures. But it's okay, I get it now. For me, pictures are documentation that something really DID happen. Going through old pictures is one of my favorite things to do when I need a pick-me-up, especially when most of my family and friends live so far away. You would think that I would have learned how to use all the functions on my camera properly if I love photos so much.... but no. Which explains why we all look demonic...the red-eye feature is beyond my mental capacity. Pregnancy certainly kills brain cells. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Back to the visit...

Notice the little blue sweater Hania is wearing. That is MY MOM'S sweater, made for her by her grandmother. Can you believe it is still in good condition? And so adorable! So that means it was made by Hania's great-great-grandmother. I'm sure the dear woman never dreamed that one day little Kim's granddaughter would be wearing something she made with so much love.

"I know you guys drove 11 hours, but man, I'm so sleepy!"

Happy Birthday to me! I don't look 31, right? RIGHT?!? It's a shame you can't see my outfit. In honor of my big day I decided to wear all of my favorite things together...I'm not sure if they really "go" together, but I just hoped that maybe I could pull it off. Short purple knit dress from Ann Taylor...$50. Brown fishnet stockings...$5. Brown lace-up faux suede boots from Payless...$19.99. Trying to fool yourself into thinking you aren't 31 by dressing too young for your age....priceless! (: My parents and husband were kind enough to allow me to bask in my denial all weekend. Thanks guys!

We had a blast all weekend and there are many, many more photos on the way.

Visit from Grandma Schmonsees - a week in photos

2008-02-18T23:41:00.001-05:00

On a side note, we are not allowed to let Hania wear these little pink, fur-lined boots to church anymore. It is a disruption. On the way up to get communion some elderly lady actually said (quite loudly) "Oh look at the baby's adorable boots! Did you see them? Look Charlie! Oh, my! Little tiny boots!" It was LOUD. Maybe it was coincidence, but the organist messed up just then and I'd had it! I got tickled and was trying not to laugh out loud. But you all know how that goes...it's a nasty cycle. The harder you try NOT to laugh, the worse it is and then you MUST laugh. So by the time I got up there to take communion from our new pastor I had tears coming down my cheeks, I was beet red, and she probably thought I was just moved by the beauty of the moment. Or a complete freakshow.